Playing with your Lumps and Taking It

My roommate has a lump in her breast. She is going to get it checked out and have breast reduction at the same time. Not sure which day yet but soon. She doesn’t know if she has breast cancer or just an anonymous, harmless lump.

I don’t check my breasts for lumps. The main reason I don’t is that they always have lumps and bumps and I don’t see how you can tell which is a “lump” and which is just another lump in the pile. Once in awhile I get sore boobs, usually it’s around some point in the cycle of my period. I don’t think much of it. When I was younger I’d even have bruises on my breasts from whatever was going on in there. It’s actually like they are fighting a war, a boob tissue war. They get pinchy, sore and embattled. Anyway, if I have any bad lumps I wouldn’t know how to tell which they are apart from all the lumps in there.

Anyway, to those who have found themselves in the fight with a bad lump, good wishes to you. For the rest of us… it’s kind of like being in bed at night, in the dark. Some nights when it’s quiet you wonder about breast lumps, you poke around. In the end you just have to hope you’re one of the lucky ones.

$100 An Hour

How far would you go for $100 an hour? Would you sell yourself for an hour? Would you commit a crime? Would you… ?

Would you let a man fondle and play with your breasts in exchange for money? Assuming you are female and have breasts.

What do you think about a guy who would pay for that, $100 an hour.

What do you think about a woman who would consent to that.

I have no answers, just the possibility of $100 an hour.

I think my brother would be really upset, should he ever find out. I think my Mother wouldn’t be crazy about it, but she might understand.

Am I a total sleazebag? I’ve been a nice girl all my life. I never slept around before, during or after my marriage. What does it matter? I’m 41 now, no shy, blushing virgin.

Sometimes men, with their need for a fuck (not sex and certainly not making love) make me sick. I hate them in ways. Reading the Craiglist posts for the Toronto list, all the personals from men are geared to sex. Even the few that mention more have to add sex or the emphasis on the way she looks rather than the person she is. In reality do they really want more than a blow up doll, I think not.

So, when I need money and I really don’t expect I will find another man to have around in my life, why not get $100 an hour? If I can stand to be touched, if I can reserve everything in my mind and just be a blow up doll, why not do it?

The only problem I can see is just being too grossed out to follow through with it. I am about as virginal as 41 years old woman is likely to be. Maybe I’m a bit prudish just from a lack of experience, having only had sex with the man I was married to. One boyfriend after the divorce but no sex. My life is too crazy to be real.

Knockout Breasts

This came to me in an email this morning.

It seems that two women in their early twenties decided to go on a crime spree. The prey was men…horny men. Yep, these inventive thieves decided to dress in low-cut dresses with no bras. They dissolved powerful narcotic pills in water to create a paste and rubbed it on their breasts. Do you know where the story goes?

You guessed it. They “lured” men into licking their breasts and after the men passed out they woke up to find themselves sans wallet, car keys and cash. This was not done in the low rent districts of Bogota, but the more affluent areas. After all, who wants to roll broke winos!

The thought hit me, “how does a woman lure a man to lick her breasts?” Then I flashed back a few years and remembered it did not take too much coaxing when I was single. Oh, the benefits of memories…



What a good plan. But, I think the drugs they put on their skin would seep into their own bodies. This is likely not a true story. But, the idea is good. Along the lines of the story I was/ am writing.

Beer Comercial

Last night I watched a movie about how women and men were sterilized against their wishes. It was called Heart of the Sun or something like that. Anyway, during this sensitive movie Molson’s beer ran an ad (at least 4 times) in which men are secretly watching a group of women skinny dipping in a lake, using binoculars. The women are not aware of the men watching them.

First of all, the amount of skin shown on the women shocked me. I really could not believe an ad showing breasts and butt like that would be allowed past the censors. The men were fully clothed. Actually, the only thing missing was for them to be holding the binoculars with one hand and stroking their cocks with the other.

Secondly, the whole idea of making a beer commerical about an invasion of privacy is just too much. Women are abused this way every day. That does not make it ok to use for a beer commerical. What are they really selling? How many people do you think will remember which brand of beer that was? Most will be trying to tape the commercial so they can save the nude scenes and share them with others. There are whole websites devoted to upskirts, in which men take secret pictures of women. It should be illegal, women should be protected from this kind of abuse but we are not. Instead we are now being used to sell beer.

Here is what I wrote to Molson this morning:

Last night I saw Molson’s new beer ad at least 4 times, the one with the women skinny dipping and the man (then men) watching with binoculars. No doubt this does happen at some lake somewhere but that does not make it ok for a beer commercial.

I was angry each time that commercial came on. To me Molson is abusing women to sell beer. Molson has sold our right to privacy and our safety for its profit. I doubt anyone who would approve of that ad has ever been violated, had their home invaded/ robbed or been phoned by peeping toms to comment on how they looked stepping out of the shower moments ago. Women are abused in this way every day and now Molson is selling beer on it.

There is also the issue of how much of the women’s bodies were exposed for that ad. I as pretty shocked at the amount of skin, breast and buttocks shown. Molson has definitely crossed over the line from “cute” to soft porn.

I hope they will pull the ad, but I doubt it. No doubt it will sell a lot of… beer.