Netscape Composer

Netscape didn’t fare well in the browser wars a couple of years ago when the Net was still web behind the ears. (No, that’s not a typo, I’m just trying to be clever). But, today when I wanted to make a quickie change to a website I went in search of FrontPage on my PC only to realize I’ve yet to reinstall it from the last reformat of my hard drive. sigh

But, lurking there, covered in dust bunnies, was Netscape and Netscape Composer. I liked Composer long before I ever forked out the money for Front Page. They are actually a lot alike. Now, you seem to have to register to use Composer which was annoying as I loathe having more passwords and logins to bugger around with. But, it does work. Also, though I don’t have time this afternoon to really test it out, Netscape seems to have that feature that lets you make changes to your site and then load it to your domain. No resorting to an extra bit of softare for the ftp thing. That is convenient, one of the best things about Front Page. If Netscape works for the uploading I may not reinstall Front Page afterall. How many bulky, cantankerous programs do you need on one hard drive?

Goldfish in a Rain Barrel

My nephew, Zack, brought some goldfish here which he and Grandma had bought after the Potato Festival. He had tried to win some goldfish at the Festival but couldn’t get his money to land in the glasses. Likely you’ve all tried that game at least once and know it’s a lot harder than it appears. Anyway, Grandma told him he could buy goldfish for a lot less than another round of playing the game. Zack couldn’t believe fish were so cheap. 🙂 So they went to a pet store and bought a couple of feeders for a mere 37 cents each. Zack was impressed.

For a couple of days the fish were on the kitchen table in a glass jar with the original water they came in. Pretty limited space and likely would have led to a short life. But, once Zack went back home we poured them into the rain barrel in the backyard. I wasn’t sure how they would do but my Mom (Grandma) was sure they would be fine and really like it. I could see how it would be much better than their current home.

Anyway, I poured them in myself. I watched them slowly sink down to the depths of the barrel to disappear. I waited quite a while but they never came back up. We went away for the weekend and I thought about them now and then. Thinking that the metal barrel might not be good for them or that racoons might knock over the wire grate and get at them. But, when I checked on them both were fine, swimming around near the top and quite healthy looking. Plus, I could no longer see any sign of all the mosquito and other insect larva floating around on the surface of the water. Nice bonus!

Sadly, when I checked on them today (about 3 weeks later) one is belly up in the barrel. The other is fine, I noticed him under a tiny leaf which had dropped into the water. The second fish was actually not a feeder. I wonder if those goldfish (one step up from feeders) are a bit stronger or healthier to start with. It’s likely as the feeder fish are only expected to live long enough to make it home and become lunch for some other creature. Anyway, I think I will buy another goldfish so the other guy/ gal isn’t alone in there. Plenty of space to be alone in.

I didn’t find much online about keeping goldfish in a rain barrel though I just started looking this afternoon. Here is a discussion about rain barrels and preventing mosquito larva. Goldfish were offered as one option. Likely the best one I think fish would be the most natural and have the plus of being compost when they die. Some argue that’s cruel. But I think keeping them in aquariums is an unnatural and more cruel life for them. People tend to go overboard on the whole pets thing. They are still animals. A free life is better than being tanked up and gawked at.

Sagittarius Zodiac Compatibility

Sagittarius & Sagittarius

A pair of world travelers with an intellectual bent, they range far and wide in quest of spiritual or physical adventure, with an unsinkable optimism. Explorers, philosophers, athletes: they spend their life on the road and enjoy a vigorous discussion. As for the nest, or putting down roots, neither partner deems such goals worthy of attention. They’d be happy to live in a tent all their lives; often, their home is just a transfer point. They spend one night there and then set off in quest of new discoveries. But this enthusiastic and curious couple has the key to its own happiness.

Missing Eric

This morning Eric left to go back to Vancouver. I spent the whole day feeling sad. I wrote to a friend online and she told me how silly I was being (probably). Then I finally stopped being quite so silly and I went offline to check the phone. There were 4 messages from Eric while he waited at the airport to take off. Now I know I was being too silly for words today. I feel so much better, even my headache is starting to go away. 🙂 Eric is a wonderful man. Yes, I know it’s too soon and Yes, I know I’m not really sure what I feel but I love him. I don’t just like him. I can’t help it.

Sagittarius and Sagittarius

When two Sagittarians come together, they form a brilliant union of truthseeking travelers. This duo takes on the world through educated lenses and shares the quest for new knowledge. They enjoy pleasant conversation and banter that challenges and entertains the mind. Philosophy, concentration, and an occasional hotheaded dispute characterize the Sagittarius-Sagittarius relationship.
Easygoing and independent, this couple is compatible when it comes to balancing personal interests. Jealousy is not an issue, as each partner has personal projects that they pursue in their free time. When they are together, however, they make the most of their time and really care about pleasing their partner and satiating common interests. Flexible and modern, they can, at times, lose their temper. However, it is not in the Archer’s nature to hold a grudge or feel the effects of long-term disagreements.

Sagittarius is ruled by the Planet Jupiter. Expansion is the key word here; as both partners enjoy the acquisition of knowledge, they will also enjoy adding new and exiting ideas to their relationship. They must be wary of indulging in too much excess, as such gluttony will only slow them down. Their mutual charm and wit makes them a very pleasant couple not only to one another, but they will be the first on everyone’s invitation list.

Sagittarius is a Fire Sign. Two Fire Signs together merge to build a taller flame. They constantly reach out together and experience life: you love to share vacations or archaeological digs rather than just reading about them in books. Outgoing and friendly, it is the disease of the Sagittarean psyche to speak before thinking, thus finding them self in awkward social situations at times. The two love to begin new projects, but neither have the tenacity to keep them going and they both lose interest equally quickly. Both are eager to move ahead to the next new thing.

Sagittarius is a Mutable Sign. The flirty, exciting Sagi is incredibly easy to get along with, for the most part. Arguments rarely result between them. Both are only too happy to accommodate their significant other. Every so often a stubborn thorn will pop up, but neither partner dwells on this subject and the matter is quickly forgotten.

The best aspect of the Sagittarius-Sagittarius relationship is their enviable compatibility and their shared interest in a quest for knowledge. This pair has found the perfect balance between devotion and giving each other adequate space. Together, this couple will explore the world.

Forwarding Along to Myself

Love match:
Sagittarius and Virgo

When Virgo and Sagittarius join together in a love match, the result is a well-rounded couple. Sagittarius is an explorer who loves to socialise, while Virgo prefers to analyse Sagittarius’ discoveries. Both enjoy talking about it with one another. Virgo may demand perfection too soon for Sagittarius’ taste, but over time Sagittarius will appreciate a steady and reliable lover whose head isn’t always in the clouds.

Virgo and Sagittarius have unique approaches to life; Virgo is more practical and less distracted, while Sagittarius is the energetic explorer. It can be hard for Sagittarius to go along with the pragmatic realism of Virgo. Virgo may have a hard time accepting the Sagittarian energy. Virgo can offer Sagittarius a secure base and keep them focused on their dreams and ambitions. Sagittarius can add variety and new excitement to Virgo’s day.

Virgo is ruled by Mercury and Sagittarius is ruled by Jupiter. Mercury is about communication, and from Virgo’s perspective, analysing. Jupiter is philosophy, higher learning and travel. These two are about interpersonal communication and can sustain one another. Virgo and Sagittarius can amuse each other by discussing art and literature in great depth, Virgo focusing on the details and Sagittarius commenting on the broader picture.

Virgo is an Earth Sign and Sagittarius is a Fire Sign. Sagittarius wants freedom, while Virgo needs financial strength and domestic stability. Sagittarius is motivated by pure feeling, while Virgo is more of a thinker. As long as they reassure each other that their love for one another is solid and real, any disagreements can usually be resolved.

Virgo and Sagittarius are both Mutable Signs. It’s easy for these two to become interested in each other’s lives. Each has no trouble granting the other the freedom to enjoy things external to the relationship. They have a wonderful, complimentary style of interaction and have no trouble working together.

What’s the best aspect of the Virgo-Sagittarius relationship? It’s the security they can give one another once they discover their similar lifestyles. They make a wonderful couple once they can teach one another to look at the world through new eyes. As long as they communicate and appreciate what they can learn, theirs will be a stable and happy relationship.

Being in Love

I’m kind of scared. I’m trying not to be. David probably isn’t scared, not much anyway. I’m not sure how he is doing it. How do you take a big chance on someone? How do you just let them become such a big, important part of your life? How do you love someone? I’m starting to love David.

But, I’ve been here before with these online things. At least three times that come to mind now. One was Dave, the helicopter pilot. He wanted me to move to Oregon. He wanted me to do kinky things to him that I wasn’t really sure about. But we talked a lot. He was the channel owner of the chat channel on IRC. I liked being the main squeeze of the guy in charge. I know that was probably what made him attractive to me at the time. Then, one night the rug began to slip out. I had to drown a few kittens that day, a mercy killing. It was horrible and I came online pretty upset and just wanted him to listen and sympathize. He couldn’t. He just wanted to talk about himself. My needs were pushed aside so he could tell me about his own. That was when I knew this wasn’t going to be the guy I wanted. Later he had a terrible accident in the helicopter, delivering Christmas trees. But, even before that I knew I wanted out. It was just harder not to feel like a bitch when I left. I did though. Yes, he needed someone, but it didn’t matter if it was me or some other female. Anyway, he was never the same after the accident.

There was Sherkhan (Richard) before helicopter Dave. But that ended as friends, good friends. I do miss him and wish him all the best. Last I heard he was with another online friend. They’ve been together awhile now. I wish I hadn’t lost their email addresses. Too much moving and computer death.

There are three more I’ve thought of as I type this: Artistry (Dale), Chris and Lynn my dragon friend. Lynn and I were never romantic. But, I wondered. I loved him in some way, more than just a friend. I don’t know what he felt, he was kind of closed off. A hard person to really know. I did feel love for him but it wasn’t romantic or like brother and sister really. Maybe it was a seed that never sprouted.

Artistry, there’s a story I’ll never know the end to. I was brand new online. I fell madly in love. I thought he felt something. I don’t know really. I think he played games and even if he really did have feelings for me I think the games mattered more to him. He made a sudden departure. It was a crushing defeat for me, for awhile. I lost all those feelings of being in love. I’d never felt that before or since. Not the passion, the way the colours in the world were all brighter and the way I could read a romance novel and really… get it! Artistry betrayed me, lied and then never would tell me what changed. Maybe he never felt anything. But I did. That much I’ve kept.

Chris then, the one that hid himself away. I think of Chris the most of them all. I wrote erotic stories for Chris. I made him my online lover. He was an Englishman living in Hong Kong. When I wrote him an email it was noon my time and midnight his time. But we were friends, real friends. I could tell him anything and I did tell him a lot. I know he cared for me at least as much as I cared for him. But, he couldn’t take that final chance of actually meeting. He was a Scorpio. I’ve come to know how secretive Scorpios are. He just kept to the pattern. But, I’d be glad to talk to Chris again. I would love to know he missed me and our talks and our stories. I don’t need him to love me. That’s passed. But I miss that wonderful, warm friend. He will always be special in my life.

I married Todd. But I don’t include him in the online romances. We were penpals for over 20 years then we met face to face. He kissed me and said there were sparks. But it ended in a divorce a few years later.

Now there is David. He tells me he loves me and I believe what he says. I just find it hard to believe it’s me this is happening to. I’d given up after Todd. But I’m forever an optimist. I tried to meet more men. I answered their brief emails with as much of my whole heart as I could dig up. But each one fell flat. No answering beat, no pulse, no feeling. After a few of those I didn’t even want to try. I wanted to beat men up in general. Those unfeeling clods! How dare they not see me. How dare they talk about the great woman they want to meet and then ignore me when I’m sitting right here! How dare they start something they can’t bother to finish? How dare they strike a match and leave it to burn itself out, unnoticed.

So here I am now and there’s David. I’m afraid it will be some joke of fate. After all this time how can I now find someone that really does want me in spite of everything. It can’t be real. I keep sending him reasons he shouldn’t love me. In case he changes his mind now when it’s not too hard for me to lose him. But he still says he loves me and he’ll wait right here for me. He’s coming here for me. He didn’t even expect me to move there. He’s moving here, uprooting his life and his computer and coming here. There is nothing here but me. How can I live up to that? What if I’m not good enough? Not that I think I’m not. Mostly some of the time. Now and then I feel I’m half of a really great couple, the sort of couple who grow old together and are the envy of all their grandchildren. Now and then it’s so close I can almost taste it. But I’m still alone. It’s not easy to have faith but I’m trying. I’m trying for David cause I think he’s worth it. I am too.