A Pukable Offense

I’ve never been into that whole drinking, intending to get drunk, making an ass of yourself and puking thing. Actually, my Uncle was an alcoholic. It wasn’t the drinking that turned me off it was the way he treated people. I spent a lot of family holiday dinners as the one he talked at, leaned over/ on, argued with, accidentally injured physically and so on. There was no joy in mudville.

My Mother (as it turns out) never even knew about all the times I was stuck babysitting him. I used to be angry at her cause she and the rest of them would go to bed and leave him there. I couldn’t ever do that for some oddly sick reason. I was so relieved when he finally decided to go to bed or realized it was beginning to get light outside and sent me to bed. I think looking after a drunk like that would cure just about anyone of ever wanting to become shit faced themselves.

I do like a drink, sometimes an Irish coffee when I’m out somewhere. Maybe a white wine or two at family dinners. But, I never go beyond a gentle buzz, which is one or two drinks for me. I did drink too much once when I was a teenager. I didn’t do it intentionally I just pushed the boundaries. I was at home and babbled to my Mother, a lot of things I wouldn’t have told her otherwise, a lot of personal thoughts. In the morning I felt like I was going to puke and I had a headache for most of the day.

Anyway, I have no sympathy for drunks. I no longer get stuck babysitting them or silently tolerating them (I avoid bars or “parties” where people will be drinking). Sometimes I end up in a place where someone has become a drunken ass. Just watching them makes me so angry I have to leave before I push them in front of a large speeding truck. Yes, I have issues.

Next time you’re busy getting shit faced you might want to think about the people who have to deal with you. Do they really like you THAT much? Do they really want to deal with you now or the next morning?

Drinking and driving is another whole ball of wax. I have a zero tolerance there. Taking away a driver’s license is a joke. I think they should be tossed in shark infested water, that would sober them up pretty darn quick. See if you can drive home now, asshole.