Vancouver

The Torture and Temptation of the Lust for Really Good Chocolate

I’m having a small problem with chocolate… I want it! I want it often and I want it served warm and tasting like real chocolate with cream to smooth it out. I want it every day, more than once.

But, I’m trying to ignore chocolate and cheesecake and ice cream and all those soft, warm or chilled, yummy things. I lost almost 20 pounds but last month I put back two of them.

I blame chocolate, whether the chocolate truly deserves the blame or not.

I Know it will be Warm, Rich and Creamy – Everything I Lust for in Chocolate

Did you know how nice and easy it is to order chocolate to be delivered to your door? I ordered a box of chocolates from a Canadian chocolate company out on the west coast, Vancouver, British Columbia. To get to my house that chocolate had to travel across thousands of kilometres, several provinces and it made the trip a day early. I opened the box, reverently. I tried to be mindful and enjoy every moment and each nuance of chocolate. But, I had eaten three of the milk chocolate bars before I could make myself put the box away.

So, ordering chocolate is not the best way to deal with a craving for chocolate.

I’m still looking for alternative ideas. Today I noticed this Bialetti hot chocolate pot, mostly for the photo. I can taste that chocolate. I know it will be warm and rich and creamy… Everything I lust for in chocolate. I haven’t decided whether or not to order the machine. It’s a risk. What if I like it too much?!

Then I started looking at other well known (to me) chocolate companies who will send packages of chocolate to your door, via Amazon. Oh, the torture, the temptation… I can taste it and it tastes GOOD!

The best I can do is give in to the craving for chocolate but moderate it. This means letting myself have the chocolate but only once a month and then making sure the chocolate I have at that time is the best possible chocolate on the planet at that particular place and time. No supermarket chocolate bars. No packaged hot chocolate mixes. Only the best, real chocolate and I want it smooth, rich and creamy. A chocolate pudding, but not something out of a cardboard box.

I’m adding the hot chocolate maker to my list of things to buy, along with a bathroom scale. Next month there will be chocolate! Better chocolate.

Cute Little Devil

Watching Alice (again). Filmed in Vancouver with a lot of Canadian, US and British actors. Andrew-Lee Potts is one of the Brits. I’ve seen him before in Primeval. Charming smile. He wears a lot of eye make up in Alice, I don’t think he needed that much.

I Am Not at Home

I’m not sure what I’m doing. The upstairs tenants have not moved out their stuff. So work on fixing and cleaning up there is not making any progress. Yet, I am 100% sure they do not have any thought to paying another month of rent for April. Just free storage for them. I’d like to bag it up and burn it all. But, you can’t do that. People who do wrong are protected by law. It’s the poor idiots who have done nothing that are screwed over and over again. Ugh!

I might go back down to the apartment this week for a day or two. It’s so messed up right now. Too many things. My brother is away in Vancouver and I told him he should go. Though it is a bad time with the house trying to be ready to be sold, or at least on the market. I had a feeling George and the elephants upstairs (his family) would be jerks. But, I let optimism reign and I encouraged my brother to go even when he said to me (in that way of asking me) that it wasn’t a good time to be going away. My brother worries too much about his sisters and his Mother though. He is a good brother but needs to get away. Not that he won’t worry and he does have something to worry about. Will it really be a break now when they are making life so difficult for him back here?

Graham asked me to be down there and get George and elephants out of there. But, I can’t. I talked to the real estate agent and she said there is nothing to be done. The police won’t do anything. We can’t do anything but ask them to get the fuck out, in a nice, professional ‘can I lick your ass’ way. How bloody stupid. You could insure your home for a bundle. Move all your valuables out to another place and torch the house just to get those pests removed. I think that really is the only way to do it.

Anyway, I don’t know where I will be living again. I don’t know if I really want to put a lot of energy and time into job hunting now. If I actually get a job I’d likely have to leave it. I can’t afford the rent in Toronto. Not unless I live under someone’s sink or something.

Why do I always end up back in the same place, the same stuff always comes back to get me. It’s like it doesn’t matter what I do I always end up right back here as the vagabond. No wonder I daydream about winning the lottery. Though I try not to cause it’s not getting me anywhere.

Today I am meeting Zack, the nephew, for a Tim Hortons after school. He wants to go to Goodwill and look at books and game CD’s. I saw one he was interested in yesterday and mentioned it to him. I will have to put grocery money into the car as gas to keep it from getting too close to empty. That car seems to suddenly lose all gas once the quarter tank shows. More financial planning for me. I’m so sick of it. I want to not worry about having food in the last half of each month. I want to know where I will be living for the rest of my life and not have to move at least once a year.

No doodle today. My scanner is away. I don’t even have plain, crisp white paper to doodle on here.

Get Paid to Have and Abandon Kids

This is a real post from Toronto Craigslist. So strange that a guy would ask for a woman who wants kids and then offer to pay her to get pregnant and abandon them. Would that be the kind of guy you would want to raise your kids?

Short term relationship
Reply to: removed
Date: 2006-03-22, 1:27PM EST

Have you been thinking of having kids and not sure if you can carry the financial burden?
I am looking for a surrogate mother to bear my own kid/’s and in return you would be compensated for your time. Should you like to meet up for a chat and possibly take it further, feel free to reply and take it from there.

Another Ad for a Surrogate Mom

I’m not out looking for these things. I was looking at the Vancouver Craigslist cause there was a telecommuting job. Then I wandered into the personal ads cause they are always interesting. I wondered if there was much difference with men in Vancouver versus Toronto. I think it’s a bit more arty out there. Not much else of difference though. I was surprised to find the ad below. But, at least he isn’t intending to pay off the Mother and have her disappear. He seems to want a family but is looking for a short cut. My take on it anyway.

Looking for a pretty girl for Surrogacy
Reply to: removed
Date: 2006-03-21, 12:35PM PST

Hi,

I am an Asian graduate student in Vancouver, 175cm, 68kg, smart, healthy, nice, and for sure handsome. I am looking for a girl (specificly 18-28 years old, 165cm+, beautiful, smart, healthy and nice) whose race is different from me (Caucasian is prefered), for romantic and meaningful love and, possibly, its “product”: a baby. By the way, I am serious and responsible for the coming child and the mom.

Your pic will get mine, if you are interested.

Hope this will not disturb you. Thanks.

[bbe] Father, if it is your pleasure, take this cup from me: but still, let your pleasure, not mine, be done.

* this is in or around Vancouver

Comments (cut and pasted from the old blog this was originally posted to.)

At first, it hit me as really strange too, but as a single lady who never had a chance to have a family of my own, as much as I wanted one, I can kinda understand where he’s coming from. And it’s gotta be worse for a guy, since he can’t have the child himself. At least I could’ve if I chose to go that route.
Comment by skye

I understand that part too. But, if he feels such a need to have kids why does he expect he can pay off the Mother and have her disappear. Also, why doesn’t he WANT the kids Mother to be around? Most women would want at the very least, contact with their kids. Would you give birth and then disappear with your pay cheque? Those would be YOUR kids, no matter what the arrangements you made with him are. I think it’s very strange. I would like to have kids, even still. But not this way. No way. I want to know my kids and have them know me.
Comment by ThatGrrl

I never said I would be able to give them up. But, really, in a way, it’s like a woman giving up a child for adoption. Everyone has their reasons for doing so, and some are just very passionate about helping anyone they can to have a child. Some people don’t do it just for the money.
Comment by skye

Putting the money issue aside. Don’t you think it’s odd that he wants to keep the kids but get rid of the Mother?
Comment by ThatGrrl

No, I don’t. It’s not like he has feelings for this woman. If she stayed in the picture, she might want to have a say in how the kid was raised, which may go totally against how he wanted it raised.
Comment by skye — March 23, 2006