I Broke My Favourite Glass Mug

I pulled it out of the dishwasher, still hot. Did not think but went ahead and poured in a little coffee cream, cold from the fridge. I heard that little ping and, sure enough, my glass mug had a huge crack, splitting the bottom and up each side. I am annoyed with myself. I should have had my brain on but I was working on autopilot.

I found more of them. But, they are not available for online shopping. I did find some on eBay, but the shipping is expensive,  beyond considering. So, I will just wait until I am somewhere there is an Ikea store. Funny, Ikea is so popular but this will be the first time I have ever had a plan to shop there. But, the mugs (called beer tankards) are in stock.

Sexy Monster: Mandragora

The Witches of East End series didn’t make it for a third season. I liked the show. But the mandragora will be far more memorable.

The mandragora love scene in the forest was more than I expected from TV sex. The Mandragora has a tail and he knows how to use it! The hottest thing for me was that tail touching her and then slipping under her skirt to continue touching her, intimately. Tentacles are a turn on… tails too in this case.

Witches of East End: Mandragora

mandrago

It turns out mandragora is not something entirely made up for the Witches of East End. Mandragoras have a history. But, to make things simple and focus on the sexy mandragora from the show I’ve made a list of what made the monster for this show.

So what is a Mandragora?

  • lives in woods and forests
  • has the ability to cloak itself in order to avoid detection
  • can appear and disappear in a swirl of vines
  • can alter the memories of its victims
  • feeds on sexual energy of their chosen mate
  • mate is put into a trance and called to them
  • possessive and protective of mate
  • green/ blue body of a man, composed of scales but appears to be plant based
  • long, flexible tail seems to be used for seduction mainly
  • blue tentacles come from it’s back in order to feed or attack
  • tentacles inject Dracos Sanguinum (Dragons Blood) into victim’s brain

For those who want more…

mandrakespirit

“The spirit of mandrake is known as Mandragora and has a twin known as Mandragoro. The mandrake is the only traditional plant of Witchcraft that possesses two distinct spirits and appears in the form [of] a female or male human with plant features. The mandrake spirit serves to link humankind with plant-kind and is therefore a magical bridge to the Greenwood Realm and the space of Shadow from which all mysteries flow. In legend, the mandrake is known as the Sorcerer’s Root and connects its possessor with the Old Magic.”

– Raven Grimassi

Kinky Sex Tips For Curious Girls

Source: 7 Kinky Sex Tips For Curious Vanilla Girls – The Frisky

  • Initiate a kink conversation
  • Start off slow
  • Do some erotic brainstorming
  • Tantalize your partner’s senses
  • Be creative
  • Use safe words
  • Have a post-kink debrief

Not the best list. To start with, initiating a conversation about sex (kinky sex) would be a big deal.  How many non-kinky women are going to jump right in that way? Not many.

Leave some hints, without being too subtle. But, only IF this is a guy you can really trust to try something kinky with. Women starting out as submissive need to educate themselves about kinks, fetishes and BDSM before letting him lead you blindly. A safe word is not enough. By the time things get to needing a safe word it’s already gone too far. Start slow is the best advice in this list. The second best is to have a talk afterwards. Even if you feel silly or shy, especially if you feel upset, talk about it within the hour. Talk about it again later when your feelings have sorted themselves out a bit. Talk again before you try anything else.

Be creative, in the way of taking things slow. Adapt the stuff you have seen in movies, magazines, online into something mild and saner. No matter how into it you think you are (or he says he is) take time to find out how you really feel when you are actually in the situation. It’s all a lot different when it’s real. Plus, you have to live with it, have memories of it.

For submissive women – don’t assume anyone claiming to be a dominant actually knows what they are doing. Don’t trust someone too easily. Submission is giving up control but not being a door mat and having no power or voice at all.

For dominant women – don’t be led into doing what he wants. Discover what you want and do things your own way. Domming can get very boring if you really aren’t interested in what you’re doing.

Keep each other safe along the way. Communicate with each other and find kinky communities locally and/ or online to get real advice from.

The Neatness of Blogging About Sex

The real question is – How do Wookies type with all that hair on their fingers? Once you get past that go ahead and read the questions and answers Kilted Wookie posted for this distinguished award in blogging neatness. To follow are the questions I answered when it was my turn and last – the questions and nominees I’ve passed this award along to.

  1. How did you come across your blogging persona?
  2. What inspired you to write your first blog?
  3. What is your greatest unfulfilled fantasy/dream?
  4. What has blogging taught you about yourself?
  5. How many “real life” people know you are a blogger and how did it make you feel when you discovered they knew?
  6. Lights on or off?
  7. What do you normally wear in bed?

Source: A Real Neat Blog? | A Kilted Wookie Writes…

How did you come across your blogging persona?

It’s not really a persona. Somewhere between being contrary, curious and painfully honest I am just being myself. But, we are all full of ourselves, lots of niches and unexpected surprises. So, it’s not too hard to be myself and yet be different from who I am when I’m not thinking about relationships, men or anything related.

The other reason I don’t try to keep up a persona: it’s just too complicated! I know people who blog with several personas over several sites in different niches. I just don’t want to make my brain work that hard to figure out who I am.

What inspired you to write your first blog?

My first blog was on something other than GeoCities (which Yahoo bought out) back in 1996. I loved the free writing, the derring-do of doing anything as long as you could understand enough HTML to do it!

On top of that, it was liberating to write and talk about sex, kinks and fetishes. I didn’t blog about that until a bit later. Back then I was having a great time as an IRC diva. I met a lot of the early online BDSMer’s. I did things online that people don’t seem to do online any more. Or, not nearly as well. In those early days the men were more fun and didn’t always offer you photos of their penis.

I began writing about my IRC adventures just for fun. We played a lot of truth or dare and we played live BDSM scenes and events too. I was involved in BDSM auctions as the seller, buyer and the auctioneer – I was up there being sold too. It was a great group and I wish I hadn’t lost touch with all of them. But.. Dommed if you do; Dommed if you don’t.  Years later I wrote for the red light zone at BackWash.com but the whole network has been gone for years now. That was another good community.

What is your greatest unfulfilled fantasy/dream?

The simple wish for someone to grow old with. I think that is the hardest fantasy to fulfill.

What has blogging taught you about yourself?

I don’t really have an answer for that. Blogging (writing) has gotten me through rough times in my life. Did I learn anything? Seems not, I keep doing the same stuff over again and expecting something to be different. But, I don’t think I’m insane, just contrary.

I guess I have learned that pushing yourself to be perfect and make everyone else content is just a way to burn yourself out. I still haven’t learned it well enough to stop trying to be perfect. With blogging you really do have to write for yourself, no matter what all the SEO guru regurgitate in all their blogs.

How many “real life” people know you are a blogger and how did it make you feel when you discovered they knew?

They all know because I told them. It’s not a deep, dark secret. I even told them I write adult content (fiction and non-fiction). Recently (this year) it came up in conversation and my family were surprised I write about sex. Then they remembered they had forgotten about it. So, not much drama there.

I don’t introduce myself as a sex blogger. I decide when to pop it into the conversation or if to mention it at all.

Weirder than the blogging thing is having posted your photo in your Fetlife profile then have a man you don’t know approach you in the grocery store in town – and he knows your name!

Lights on or off?

You can’t turn the lights off in the day. It doesn’t matter to me. Lights off is nice because I can take off my eye glasses and not see any better or worse in the dark. Lights on is good – less chance of poking him in the eye, etc.

What do you normally wear in bed?

I love long nightgowns. Some are soft cotton, some are silky, slinky satin but the longer the better, with sleeves too. I like something luxurious that will sway along with me when I walk. Assorted colours: deep red, dark pink, jewel tones of green and blue, soft yellow, orange… etc.

I know women who wear underwear and bras to bed, I’ve never done that. It’s enough to wear all that stuff day to day. The evenings are my time to feel decadent, romantic like a woman from long ago, but with the modern conveniences of indoor plumbing.

On to my own nominations and questions forthwith:

Gracie at Sex Kitten @GraciePassette

Submissive Guy Comics @SGCposts

A Bad Gentleman  @abadgentleman

A Slip of a Girl @SlipOfAGirl

Rose at Ruined Boudoir @RuinedBoudoir

  1. What colours do you like to wear to feel sexy, and why?
  2. You have an unlimited budget and no figure flaws to consider – describe a sexy outfit you’d like to wear.
  3. Even if you only walk from the shower to your bedroom… what do you like about walking around nude?
  4. Is sex more mental or physical for you, how/ why?
  5. What is/ was the best thing about your favourite sexual partner so far?
  6. Did you tell him or her at the time, or ever?

 

 

About Sexual Rejection From Women

I’d add to Gracie’s post (see below) and say the hormones for men and women are on opposing sides. For men sex is pretty simple, you’re in and then your’re done. For women sex isn’t simple. Getting pregnant is just one thing.

Although I think it is changing for younger people, those just coming out of high school, women have been taught/ brain washed to dislike our bodies and think we should not have sex. That’s a combination that doesn’t work out so well for men who want simple, easy sex.

A typical woman does not go a day without seeing standards of female beauty, vitality and sexuality plastered all over her world. This does not make the typical woman feel desirable. No wonder she doesn’t feel like having sex any and every time he asks. How many men could go through a day of being shown how inadequate they are and then perform upon request?

Also, being asked for sex in a “pass the salt” way is not romantic. Not that every sexual encounter should or must be romantic, but… It shouldn’t be as commonplace as going to the bathroom either.

Could men put some effort into getting sex? Beyond just asking and expecting sex, could men make it seem like they care versus just taking care of a bodily function? If men need more sex then do what women have done since the dawn of time: masturbate. The orgasms are much better, fantasies are great, and there’s less mess to clean up. What do men think all those rejected women do when they get home, alone?

Dudes, your hormones (primarily, anyway) cycle every 24 hours; that, and not your love for us, is why you get a woody every morning. On the other hand, our cycle of hormones is a bit more complicated and lengthy than that; the result is that we are on far less of a “daily horny schedule” than men. And that’s before we get into realities like the processes of pregnancy and menopause. We don’t just age and change to disrupt your fantasies and desires; we ride the wild wave of our biology because that’s fucking life. Literally.

In a civilized culture, where humanity & good citizenry is defined largely by our ability to override our animal nature, hormones still have their way with us. Even amidst our culture wars and culture lag, they play their role. But, romance aside, if culture is to override such base things as biology, then something desperately needs to be done in terms of equality and the messages being sent to and about women.

Source: Hetero Men Complain About Sexual Rejection From Women. Really? | Sex~Kitten.net

The Train Not Taken

Originally posted: November 17, 2006

He was on the train again. The guy with a shaved head, charcoal grey suit this time and a red silky looking scarf. No hat, he never wore a hat no matter how much it snowed or rained. I always watched him, shy, from my seat. Sometimes he noticed me, sometimes he didn’t.

I hadn’t seen him this past week. One whole week of commuting without seeing him. I had nearly cried on Friday night, thinking he must have moved or changed jobs and I would never have the chance to meet him now. I regretted not doing something, even something really dumb.

But, there he was back again. Same shaved head, same suit and that same smiley face. He was just one of those people who seemed to smile easily. Sometimes he had conversations with the people around his seat. He laughed easily too and it was a laugh that made me smile, even on the hardest days when I felt worn down to a stub of myself.

I had to meet him tonight, finally. I couldn’t let another day pass by. Maybe he had moved and today was one last trip on the old commuter train. My palms were slick and my stomach in knots but I just had to do something this time.

I knew I looked ok, not one of my better days for looks but it wasn’t too bad. Hopefully I didn’t get too wind blown while I was waiting at my stop for the train. I couldn’t quite dare reach up to pat my hair, he might look over at just that moment. Continue reading The Train Not Taken

Real Women

Originally posted to Sex Kitten (2003 – 2004)

What is your body for? Some people might think it’s a mode of transportation for their brain. Some people might think it’s something to be used to lure men to their doom, like the legendary sirens. Some might talk about procreation, having babies, continuing the species, all that sort of stuff. Some others might think it’s just advertising in motion.

Whatever it’s for, do you know much about how it works? How do breasts make milk for babies? Why does your vagina leak even when you aren’t having an orgasm? Why do women have hair in odd places where only men should have hair? These and other questions can be answered if you care to find out. Most young women don’t know about milk ducts, or how the vagina cleans itself by leaking mucus. They don’t know what makes a woman’s breasts start having milk. Why are they so ignorant?

I think it’s because we are so focused on making women’s bodies into sex toys that we have forgotten there is a real purpose for women being different from men. It’s not just a way to turn them on. No, Virginia, there really is a vagina, not just a pussy.

Women have babies, that’s the whole point of that period thing women get monthly. Women feed babies, that’s why we have those pair of lumps stuck to the front of us. Women give birth to babies that’s why our hips tend to be wider than men’s. No, it’s not all there to sell cars, sorry, you have been sadly misinformed.

The saddest thing of all is that so many women are getting breast implants. A breast implant turns what starts out as a natural thing into nothing but a sex toy. Once implanted with those plastic bags of goop a breast can no longer function for breast feeding a baby. Is that such a small price to pay for having the biggest hooters. Is that all there is? Is that all you want to be?

Real women have breasts, not tits. Real women have a vagina, not a love tunnel. Real women are women, not sex toys or a great marketing campaign. They might not be size 2 with a D cup bra but I can tell you one thing, real women live for themselves, they don’t wait around for some man to approve.

Death by Dreaming

Originally posted to Sex Kitten (2003 – 2004)

Can you die from a wet dream?

Max was cold. Calling a succubus had seemed like a good idea at the time. That was hours ago now. Lying naked on the floor, his altar of sex toys around him, waiting and yet dreading that some mythological creature would come for him. He felt like a willing victim to his own sacrifice. But, he was willing, more than willing after eleven years of celibacy. Even now, just lying naked on the cold floor, his cock was rock hard, pointing straight up and even angling back. No man in the world was more ready for sex right now than Max.

Nothing seemed to be happening though, other than his own growing arousal. There was something about preparing yourself for kinky sex that made you need it all the more. Just lying down in the midst of his altar had brought him to full arousal and kept him there. Thinking, half dreaming, of having a succubus appear and begin taking his body was almost enough to finish him off. But, he wasn’t quite there. He wanted more than his own thoughts, his own hands stroking the well known patterns over his cock. He wanted a woman, even if she wasn’t entirely real or at all predictable. Continue reading Death by Dreaming

I Like Taking Myself to Bed

This is my contribution to #AdultSexEdMonth. This is personal and does contain mentions of taboo sexual fetishes and kinks. I don’t apologize for the contents of my sexual fantasies. 

I have a problem with sex. The problem happens when I involve anyone else with my enjoyment of sex. Masturbation is divine. You won’t catch me saying that to anyone, in person. But, masturbation is fully under my control, there is no feedback from cheap seats and I can do whatever I want to myself because I know what I like and how I like it. I explore self pleasuring – I’ve been doing it for a few decades and I’m just getting better at it all the time.

Why does sex have to be about more than one person? I think most people consider self pleasure to still be a selfish act. Or, something for only the lonely.

In actual fact, the best sex I have ever had (except for one very special situation) has been when I was alone in the room. Alone in the building even. In my thoughts I am sometimes alone on the planet even but for my trusty sex bot, or some weird space alien, or other creature from my imagination or readings of other people’s erotica. I do love a good story.

In my sexual fantasies nothing is taboo. I can masturbate my way to orgasm with fantasies of being abducted, alien men with extreme and unusually shaped cocks, age play (based on my own experience of being molested in a movie theatre – which does seem strange to me but nevertheless), sex with animals (the only time I like being near a dog) or anything else wild, dangerous and among the things I would never do in reality and would not even discuss or admit to anyone who knows me.

Having a great imagination and making use of it for your own pleasure does not make you a sexual deviant, it may make you a sexual oddity. But there is nothing law breaking about dreaming up assorted sexual situations while you lie in bed, sit at your desk or in the car… and give yourself a great orgasm.

I have learned to be quiet and fairly quick about it. I almost had my first orgasm when I was about 10. The sensations freaked me out so I stopped at the beginning of the build up. I had no idea why my body was reacting the way it was then. I hadn’t read anything about sex. Parents and sexual education in school didn’t talk about women having orgasms, how your body could flush with pleasure and then burst, all without breaking anything.

In those days I had fantasies about being looked after by a TV doctor, Dr. Kildare for those old enough to know or curious enough to look it up. Richard Chamberlain was the actor. I know this fantasy was based on my issues with my Father. I wanted that caring Daddy who would wrap me up in cotton balls, kiss me gently and make me feel good. I didn’t know about sex toys and had none. I used to bring things to bed with me and use them to play with myself. I won’t go into the assortment but, pens and pencils became my favourite bedtime pastime. Twirling a pencil over my clitoris was a good sensation.

My first orgasm came not from any understanding or knowledge about what I was doing. It was just an accident, on purpose. I was curious about the build up of sensations and finally became curious enough to keep going and see what happened next. I was a little frightened, maybe more than a little. Still, some part of my brain must have known it wasn’t unnatural, in spite of how unusual it seemed. After that first orgasm many more were to follow. By the time I was in my later twenties I was enjoying an orgasm daily. By myself.

I was a virgin, technically, until I was in my early thirties. That was the sex I mentioned earlier. We were both virgins, both the same age and both social misfits. We had been friends for years before sex came into it. We are friends again since the divorce too. So I am one of those old fashioned types who married the first man she slept with. By the way, having sex as a virgin, with a virgin was phenomenal. I doubt it would have been that amazing if we had both been younger. Without having the experience yourself I don’t think you can really ever know what it is like to have your body worshipped.

Anyway, back to the masturbation.

Masturbation can be done with nothing at all, this makes it very portable, mobile even. Sometimes I do like the feeling of something else touching me, something that does not return the feeling which I get from using my own fingers. I used to use the pencils and pens but I have since graduated to a vibrator. I don’t use batteries in it. For one thing, the noise is distracting and for another, I don’t need it to jump or shimmy or vibrate. I like it to penetrate me – but only the odd time. Mostly I like the vibrator (it’s a soft one, not hard plastic) to rub over my clitoris and push just inside the inner lips of my vagina.  I’ve read that vagina only has sensation, the ability to feel, for the first few inches. I have found it to be true. Although I can enjoy the fantasy of being penetrated by something huge, in fact, I enjoy the dip more than the fill up.

Our culture has so many taboos about women and sex, masturbation and virginity and there I was right in the cross-hairs of all three.  I haven’t slept around since the divorce and the marriage itself was light on the sex. But, I don’t feel deprived, anxious or abnormal. I love the orgasms I give myself. Men just seem to mess it all up.

My last actual boyfriend talked so much about how much sex we would have and then… he changed his mind. It ended up with me masturbating him and getting very little back from him. That just isn’t going to work out for me. It was ok for awhile but cock sucking is a double edged thing. I heard my brother and his friends call each other cock suckers and they didn’t mean it like it was a good thing. So, how can men expect women to become cock suckers if being a cock sucker is a bad thing? You can’t have it both ways. So, cock sucking makes me feel dirty, used and angry too.

So, sex with men has not really panned out for me. Men don’t really seem to get it. For one thing they focus on their own needs and when it comes to a woman they think of boobs and pussy, if that much. I want a man who knows I have a body, who discovers how aroused I can get by having my back stroked, lightly scratched and rubbed. I want a man who pats my bum and slips his finger into my pussy from behind. I want a man to explore sensual kinkiness and fetishes with me. I want a man who is masculine and knows what he wants but likes to have a woman in charge sexually. I want a man I can tie up, put in a cage and tease and torment and then laugh at him while he squirms. I want a man who can be a partner in my sexual fantasies and then add his own twist, or take over and become the Daddy who takes care of me but coaxes me to do bad things, naughty things…

I haven’t found that man. I think he might be available in years to come. Ordered online and shipped in a crate. I’d like mine to have a wind up key and an off button. It would be nice if he can also shrink in size for some of my fantasies about little men, like the tiny people from Gulliver’s Travels. I won’t go into details, just leave that for your own kinky, sensual imagination the next time you have some time to yourself and let your fingers do the walking.

Masturbation is very relaxing in the evening when you can’t sleep. (Just in case you didn’t already know).

Beginners Guide for Becoming a FemDom

held captive

BDSM has been exploding ever since Fifty Shades of Grey. Women who had lost touch with their sexual selves were now running back to their partners and jumping into bed with a new level of enthusiasm, lust and need. Bondage toys were flying off the shelves of internet stores like Adam & Eve, hardware stores sold out of rope and BDSM classes and tutorials were over-booked. But all of this BDSM focused on the woman being the submissive and the man being the dominant. Nothing spoke to the woman who wanted to be the dominant, making it seem like that wasn’t the natural way of things and that the woman had to be submissive. Well, Fifty Shades of Grey fanatics would be wrong. Being a female dominant, frequently abbreviated to FemDom, can be just as fulfilling and rewarding as being a submissive, if not more. But where and how do you begin?

Maybe you’re here because you want to take on the FemDom position in your current relationship or are looking to start one? Perhaps, your partner really wants you to do it and you just don’t know how, whatever the case, it’s important to read as much as you can about the lifestyle and step in slowly. An interesting fact is that there are far fewer FemDoms than submissives, so if you were looking to start a new relationship, you’re likely to have a good amount of men to choose from. FemDoms are also not those cliche images you see of them in movies and shows–the overly latexed, gothic girl, who’s ready stomp on your brain. You can certainly wear whatever you want and a costume is a great way to get into the mood, but if you’re not a leather, latex and spike kind of girl, you don’t have to do it. You can be a FemDom in an apron and 50s style dress if you want. It’s all about attitude, the outfit is just for show.

When you’re beginning your foray into domination, make sure you keep open communication with your partner. It is likely they’ve been on board from the start if they were prompting you to do so or knew you were interested, but you should still talk about limits. What kind of domination do they like? Are they ok with pain? What kind and how much? You might be controlling them, but you still need to set initial parameters to make sure no one gets hurt. It’s also key to set up a safe word that you can both use when things are becoming too much.

A really great way to get the relationship started is by assigning names to each other. Make him call you mistress, your highness, master…whatever you want. And make sure he is only referred to as something demeaning like slave, pussy etc.

When it comes to domination, you have to assert your power and control. You can do this by teasing your partner, humiliating them and punishing them. These things may be totally new for you, so ease in them slowly if you feel a little uncomfortable demanding your partner do things.

Teasing can be as easy as tying up your partner and then sitting on their face, blindfolding them, making them kneel for you, telling them they can’t come until you want them to, forcing them to get you off over and over again. Assert your dominance, get the pleasure you want and deny them of theirs.

Humiliation will come into play when they will do anything for you and anything to get off. This can be a lot of fun. You can make him do housework for you (two birds with one stone!), dress up like a girl, put a leash and collar on him, make him give you a massage, or make him use a dildo on himself. Be inspired by the moment and just go with it. It will be fun to see how far he will go.

Punishment can be a hard one to get used to if you’re not used to watching your partner be in pain–but you have to remember, it’s what they want. You can try ball gagging them, hog-tying, spanking or whipping them, denying them orgasm for an extended period of time, or even use nipple clamps on them. This is where its important to remember their limits and be aware of their threshold for pain.

Once you start experimenting, you’ll find a rhythm and figure out what you and your partner like and what works for you. From there keep exploring, keep reading and take part in some lifestyle events where you can meet more people like you and learn from others. Have fun and be open-minded!

Note: This is a guest post. Not all of the opinions are the same as my own.