The Top Wanted Sexual Fantasy

This post started with a pretty simple list of top female sexual fantasies from AskMen. No surprises and kind of plain and atypical really.  I narrowed the list down to be less repetitive.

A lot of fantasies involve knowing you are desired. Men have this theme in many fantasies too. I’ve read this is a reason men pay for sex, to have that feeling of knowing their partner desires them. It’s even become a business to offer the “girlfriend/ boyfriend experience”.

I think the people who are most successful in sexual relationships, the men we call great lovers and ladies men, are the men who understand this and give it to their partners. It’s a great way to get the same back. Making someone feel desired keeps them wanting more of those feelings/ wanting the source.

So why don’t more men and women work with this information? I think there is a selfishness and insecurity which keeps many people from giving or getting the romance and sex they want. Maybe having a lot of sex makes them think they do have what they want and yet… they still have this “fantasy” of being loved, seduced, desired, taken…

Change it up – don’t create the scenario create the relationship so the scenarios can follow and be shared.

  • Dominating
  • Being dominated (force fantasies)
  • Seduction (schoolgirl/ stranger)
  • Threesome
  • Voyeurism
  • Exhibitionism (strip tease)

Source: Top 10: Female Sex Fantasies – AskMen

Sexy Phoenix

deviantart.comPhoenix by brandrificus on DeviantArt

Most of the fantasy art uses women. It’s great to sometimes find something created with a man, who really looks good too. Strong, yet human in some way too.

You can buy this as a print at Deviant Art. I didn’t know they had added the option to have this on mousepads, mugs and such too. The shipping is a bit pricey for outside the US though. Still, this is better than the stuff I see on other sites like Zazzle and CafePress.

FemDom Fashion

The expected FemDom attire is silly. In this photo that leather neck brace and those boots must not be at all comfortable. I’d only wear stuff like that if someone paid me too. Paid in advance!

Fetish wear for women is too often a male fantasy. What would a woman wear, by her own choice? How do women Doms see themselves? If they took out all the male perspective how would Dom women dress?

I wouldn’t wear this. Though I like the idea of the long gloves, even those would be more for theatre, performance art.

There’s something innocent, but also something pure about vintage Femdom pictures. Back in those days being submissive actually meant something. You had to go to a sexshop to buy these magazines and you’d go over the stories and pictures again and again. There weren’t that many professional Mistresses around in those days, so finding and visiting them was a big deal. The…

Source: Vintage Femdom – Femdom Times

A Well Kept Man

It’s weird, but this makes him look more like a woman than men dressing up as women.

We get so focused on women being just parts. These parts in particular. I guess when the focus is the same parts for a male I still have the association.

Also, I don’t see all the cosmetics, frills and such as being something that makes a woman.  I don’t wear make-up myself. Does anyone else get that feeling from this image? Or, will I get more comments about how hateful I am? (Still makes me laugh a little).

Source: Mister Kristofer

Gay men BDSM sites often have good fantasy fare. But, overall it’s more fun to watch than to try to do it myself. Something like this would be fun for awhile but… for all the time it would take to get him into this, I don’t think the fun (for me) would be enough to make it worthwhile. Still, leaving him that way awhile (not unsupervised!) would probably give him a lot of subspace time. Especially if he knew I was still around but didn’t know what I was up to. I could be washing dishes but he could imagine I was up to all kinds of more interesting (for him) things. I could have fake phone conversations to really get him thinking, the mind fuck.

Why Don’t More Women Dom Men?

CaptureI think there would be far more women as BDSM Dominants if women understood what it really is. The male version is just a fantasy, their fantasy. The porn version is fiction, created for men who like the fantasy. So, women don’t really see what Domming is, just the FemDom fiction.

A woman who likes to Dom is not mean, vicious or nasty. It’s not about causing harm or taking out your frustrations. It’s about power, fun, creativity, romance and sensuality, among other things. I like to focus on the creativity and sensuality. (That makes it fun for me).

How many women would love to have control of their man if they really did have control? Tell him what you want, how you want it and when you want it… and he obeys. It works for the men who are submissive too.

There is no guarantee of sex with BDSM. Sex isn’t used as a reward or punishment. In Dominance and submission he doesn’t obey in order to get sex. He doesn’t obey because you command him, like a drill sergeant. He doesn’t obey because you’re wearing tight black leather and high heels. It’s not about worshipping women either, though some like to add that in. He obeys because he wants to, this is what he wants. He wants to obey. He wants to be a good boy. He wants to be happy, with you.

Have you ever told a man he’s a “good boy”? Watch his face. Those are powerful words. As a Dominant woman you can get a lot of mileage out of “good boy”. Play with it sometime. You don’t have to try anything else, just slip a “good boy” into the conversation. You can say it softly, romantically, sensually. Or, say it with power, energy and a little forcefulness.

Subtle, Simple Ways for Women to Dip into Domination

  • Hold his hand. Take his hand as you cross the street. Lead him by the hand and walk in front of him.
  • Order for him. You don’t need to order him around. Try ordering for him at a restaurant before he lets the server know what he wants.
  • Dress him. Tell him what you want him to wear next time you go out together. Pick out clothes that look good on him and tell him so if he objects.
  • Kiss him first. Pick a moment when it won’t lead to anything else. Just a quick, impulsive kiss, or a fondle, caress, tickle…
  • Ask him to touch you and tell him how to do it right (as you want to be touched). Anything from rubbing your shoulders, warming your hands, or stroking your back. It’s up to you.
  • Accept thanks and compliments from him. Don’t be modest or turn away positive comments. Reward him with a smile instead and thank him too.

None of these things are Earth shattering. But, you can get a feeling for being in power in your relationship. You can see how fun it is and start to want more. Also, as you take charge you begin to ask for more, expect more and then it’s just a step farther to telling him you’re going to try something new… like blindfolding him or not letting him touch you with his hands while you have your own way with him.

For women who really enjoy Domination it’s not about wearing tight costumes, carrying a whip or being a bitch. Those can be elements of it, if that’s what you actually want. But, BDSM can be all about sensuality and pleasure. As a Dominant woman you just do it YOUR way. The hard part is sticking to doing it your way and not letting things slip into giving him what he wants while you wait for it to be over. There is nothing so dull and boring as being a McDomme, a woman doing what he wants, his way and wishing you had brought along a good book for yourself.

Gargoyle

Very sexy gargoyle.

thumbs_Joe_Diamond_20Joe Diamond, de son vrai nom Ioana Nestorescu, est une artiste roumaine spécialisée dans les photo-montages fantastiques. Dotée d’une incroyable imagination, elle crée des scènes surréalistes, captivantes, dotées d’une atmosphère unique. Elle a commencé début 2009 et est totalement auto-didacte. Pour en voir davantage, rendez-vous sur DeviantArt et sur son portfolio.

Source: Art-Spire, Source d’inspiration artistique | 20 superbes photo-montages de Joe Diamond

An Ovipositor Fetish

Most people who post a link like this will slam it in some way upfront. It’s a way to distance themselves from the fetish, as if it’s something they would never do or have any interest in. But… do you really believe them? After all they are posting it.

I’m not going to do that because I do find it interesting. The idea has been something I have had a fetish fantasy about. I like most of the weird science fiction sex fetishes. (Science fiction sex fetishes are based on reading a lot of science fiction, fact and history). I only say most because there is likely something I haven’t thought of, heard of or seen on TV, that I wouldn’t like.

Having said all that, the fantasy is not reality. The fantasy is a lot more controlled and has far less consequences.

The Ovipositor lays gelatin eggs in the body cavity of your choice. Fans say the sensation of mushy extraterrestrial ovum slopping out of them is a real treat.

Source: The Emerging Fetish of Laying Alien Eggs Inside Yourself | VICE | United States