Gracie’s Questions

From Gracie on SK: Should you wish to participate, here are my relatively random questions:

Whipped cream in a can, non-dairy topping in a tub, or ala mode? (And, yeah, we’re talking sex play here, not a topping on the kind of pie you’d get at a diner.) Elaborate. *wink*

To be honest I cringe at the idea of sticky stuff on my skin in that way. So I’d be none of the above. But, if he were to pester me about it, he would be the one wearing the ice cream.

So, you’re a sex blogger, or at least a blogger not afraid to be here and respond to such questions… If you’re in a serious or committed relationship, which came first: the blog or your relationship? If you’re not in a serious relationship, one day you might be; when and how do you fancy divulging your blogging vice?

I’m not in a committed relationship. I tend to tell all – I’m pretty horrible at keeping secrets. So, I’d already have him reading my blog by the time things got in a committed way.

Would you rather be a superhero or a villain? Why?

A villain by far. I’m already known for being “the nice one” among family and friends. Do you know how limiting that is? Yes, I am nice, I respect others, I help others… and so on. But, if I could let go of all that I would LOVE to be the villain. Likely that’s what a lot of the attraction of being Dom is. I can feel like I’m dangerous, or at least not so nice.

What’s worse: marketing your blog or marketers contact you for freebie posts at your site?

I don’t mind marketing my site so much. I do things my own way. I read what others say we should do and then I decide to take them seriously or not. People asking for freebies gets annoying because they don’t show any care or respect for what I’m doing. They offer junk, irrelevant junk, mindless and meaningless praise and they even try spinning it all by telling me what a great favour they are doing me – letting me have free content for my site.

What’s the worst/rudest/nosiest question you’ve ever been asked that you refused to blog about? And will you answer it now? *wink*

I have no idea. I usually answer any question. Even something kind of shocking at first will get me thinking and next thing, I’ve written a whole answer inside my head (if not in the blog too). 

Source: In Which Am Tagged & I Grudgingly Respond | Sex~Kitten.net

Christmas Card Trees

xmascardtree

These free-standing paper Christmas trees add colorful, country charm to your Christmas decor. Cut various size circles out of Christmas cards, scalloping the edges of some. From the center of each circle cut out a 3/16-inch pie-shaped wedge. Curl the circle into a cone shape (pattern side up), overlap the ends, and tape the back.

To make the base, cut a 2-inch foam ball in half and a 1/8-inch dowel to desired height. Place the foam ball flat side down, add a drop of hot glue to an end of the dowel, and push the dowel through the foam ball until it stops. Slide the largest cone shape down the dowel, and then twist a small rubber band around the dowel; continue alternating progressively smaller cone shapes with rubber bands. Top the paper Christmas tree with the smallest cone shape and a ribbon.

via Christmas Card Projects: Decorative Ways to Recycle Christmas Cards.

Canadian Patriotic Butter Tarts

Found this recipe online but the link was broken to the source site. Tracked it down with the Wayback Machine.Patriotic-Pies

These picnic-ready, personalized pies are a fun food take-away for your guests (now say that 10 times quickly).

You’ll Need

2/3 cup brown sugar

2 eggs

1/4¼ cup butter

1 tsp vanilla

3/4 cup raisins or pecans

1 pie crust, rolled to ½” thickness

8 – 125ml jam jars, washed and buttered

Prep and Cook

Preheat the oven to 400°F.

Combine the butter and sugar and place in a medium saucepan set over medium heat. Add the vanilla and raisins or pecans, and cook until the butter has melted. (This is the filling.)

Beat the eggs and whisk into the sugar mixture, cooking over medium heat for 5-6 minutes or until the mixtures thickens and can coat the back of a spoon. Be very careful not to overcook the filling.

Roll out the piecrust and cut circles of dough with the mouth of the jam jar—2 per jar. Press one into the bottom of the buttered jar, top with filling and cover with the second piece of dough.

Cut a steam vent (small slit) into the top piece of dough, and place all of the pies on a large baking sheet.

Bake for 15 to 20 minutes or until the crust is golden brown.

Remove from the oven and allow to cool completely before placing the lid on the jar.

Decorate with the O Canada Patriotic Pie label and baker’s twine or ribbon.

via Patriotic Pies – SavvyMom.ca.

Blueberry Cream Pie

Blueberry Cream Pie

This is a recipe that I came up with on my own, but it tastes exactly like the one at Saluda Grade.

1 baked pie shell
½ cup whipping cream
3 tablespoons sugar, divided
8 oz cream cheese, softened
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cups fresh blueberries

In a bowl, beat the whipping cream and 1 tablespoon of sugar until stiff peaks form.

In a larger bowl beat together the rest of the sugar, cream cheese and vanilla extract. Once everything is well combined and the cream cheese is smooth and creamy, slowly fold in the whipping cream. Once everything is combined gently fold in the blueberries.

Pour the filling into a prepared pie shell and chill for at least and hour to allow the pie to set up. Now try to stop yourself from eating the whole thing at once.

via Blueberry Cream Pie.

Weird Facts about Cocks

Originally posted to Adult BackWash: Saturday July 10, 2004

A few weird facts picked up from the web. Made me laugh. I won’t tell which ones made me laugh the most.

Actual amout of semen per ejaculation: 1-2 teaspoons

Average number of times a man will ejaculate in his lifetime: 7,200

Average # of times he will ejaculate from masturbation: 2,000

Average total amount of lifetime ejaculate: 14 gallons

Average amount of water it takes to fill a bathtub: 35 gallons

Average # of calories in a teaspoon of semen: 7

Average length of penis when not erect: 3.5 inches

Average length when erect: 5.1

Smallest natural penis recorded: 5/8 of an inch

Largest natural penis recorded: 11 inches

Largest penis in the animal kingdom: 11 feet (blue whale)

Most arousing time of day/season for a man: early morning/fall

Best ways to improve sexual function: quit smoking, start excercising, lose weight.

Foods that improve sex life: lean meat, oysters, seafood, whole grains, and wheat germ

Percent of men who say they masturbate: 60%

Percent of men who say they masturbate at least once a day: 54%

Percent of men who say they feel guilty masturbating that often: 41%

Amount of time needed for a man to regain erection: from 2 min to 2weeks

Average # of erections per day for a man: 11

Average # of erections during the night: 9

In general, the taste of a man’s semen varies with his diet:

Some say that the alkaline-based foods (fish and some meats) produce a buttery or fishy taste.

Dairy products can create a foul taste.

The taste of semen after eating asparagus is said to be the foulest.

Acidic fruits and alcohol (except processed liquors) give it a pleasant and sugary taste.

Examples: mangos, oranges, kiwi, lemons, grapefruit, limes, Labatt Blue, Honey Brown

Odors that increase blood flow to the penis: lavender, licorice, chocolate, doughnuts, pumpkin pie. (Happy Thanksgiving!)

Merry Samhain

Merry Samhain
Originally posted to Adult BackWash, my weekly column was Bait and Switch: Saturday August 03, 2002

Chris stumbled along, blindfolded and unable to see whatever he was stumbling over. He was glad to be wearing boots at least. The trail had far too many rocks and tree branches scratching his upper body. With his hands secured in front of him, he was unable to protect himself. His Governess had strapped a heavy pack onto his back and he could feel something solid thud into his back each time he stumbled. The wind blew the chill of autumn nipped at his bare skin, bringing goose bumps and shivers along his tall frame.

His Governess walked behind him encouraging him to keep moving. She used something that made the sound of a whip and had the sting of a whip too. Chris knew she didn’t own a whip though. Chris plodded along, trying to feel for his steps but not being given the time to do so with his Governess whipping his tender bottom and urging him to keep going.

It must still be daylight; he could hear birds somewhere. He could not ask the time or anything else, he was to keep silent until allowed to speak. She had brought him here, blindfolded and tied into his seat. He knew she had brought some of her scented candles. They had scented the car on the drive, a small pleasure she had not denied him. Other smells tempted his nose too. He was sure he could smell pumpkin pie, one of his favourite things. But he hadn’t seen Governess making any pies other than the apple pies from Thanksgiving. Those were long gone, all too quickly divided up with friends and family. Chris felt lucky to have had a couple of pieces himself.

“Stop your grumbling, little man.” His Governess swatted his naked bottom and laughed lightly. “Don’t think I can’t read your thoughts, if I couldn’t figure out your mumbles any way.” Playfully, she shoved him along the path.

Chris said nothing. Just in time, he remembered he was ordered to keep silent. They didn’t walk too much farther before Governess called out to him to halt. Chris was glad to be relieved of the weight of the pack. He could hear it thud on the ground behind him as she slid the straps off his shoulders.

“Be a good boy, Chris, just stand against this tree while I get everything ready. If you attempt to wander off you might fall into the ravine and get hurt. So I will be forced to tie you for your own protection if you get fidgety.” She patted his bottom firmly and left, dragging the pack along with her.

It was cold to be out in the middle of who-knows-where naked. Chris shivered and wished he could walk around or swing his arms to warm up a bit. He couldn’t hear her any more. She could be out of view by now, maybe he could at least move around in the spot where she had left him. Chris turned around in a circle once, testing his limits. Nothing happened. Chris flexed his arms and legs, driving a little of the chill from them.

Suddenly from right beside his ear, she whispered, “Don’t say I didn’t warn you little man.”

She pushed Chris against a pine tree; the bark scraped his back and bottom. She quickly looped a rope around him and then tightened it around both him and the tree. His wrists were added to the knot She ran the rope between his legs and made it just a little too snug for his comfort. He couldn’t see what she did then. But he felt well put in his place.

“That should take care of you until I’m ready for your part in today’s sacrifice.” She jerked once on the rope between his legs, digging it into his tender cock and nudging his balls uncomfortably. She laughed nastily, kissed his chest leaving him with a last biting tug on his nipple.

All at once, the word sacrifice sprang out in Chris’s mind. What could she mean by that? She couldn’t have Pagan sacrifice in mind. Sure he knew she was Pagan. She had taught him some of her ideas and beliefs. They had even done a ritual together when her Aunt had died. Chris had been very honoured to be a part of it.

She was back again, removing his boots and socks, until he stood with his feet as bare as the rest of him. He was untied from the tree she used the rope between his legs to lead him this time. The first unexpected pull was painful as it tugged his balls and dug into his cock. But then he was moving, making sure to keep up no matter how sharp the stones and cut grass were on his feet. His only real thought was how much pain he would feel if he should stumble or even fall now!

“Stop!” She ordered. Chris stopped right away. It was probably the fastest he had ever obeyed one of her orders.

“Kneel.” Chris hesitated. It was the first time she had ever asked him to kneel. He wanted to look into her face and read her thoughts. She was usually so open. He could look at her and know how she felt, what her mood was and what she was thinking. But now his eyes were covered and her thoughts were concealed.

She said nothing as they stood there with the wind blowing and the sound of a fire crackling somewhere. Time seemed to wait with them. She did not reach out to him in any way. Not a touch, a sound or a smile that he could see. Finally, Chris bent his knees and lowered himself to the ground. When he was kneeling, feeling the grit of the ground on his knees, she said merely, “Thank you.” and removed the blindfold.

Chris looked up and at last was able to see his surroundings. First, he looked at his Governess, attired in a very thin white robe with embroidered leaves and mystical symbols around the hems and sleeves. Her body, nipples hard in the cold air, easily seen through the robe. Chris looked at her face. She smiled down at him tenderly and stroked his face.

Turning his face, she showed him her preparations. There on a very large rock sat several squash and pumpkins, a vase with dried flowers, a photograph in a silver frame, some shells and rocks, a blue and silver bowl with water in it, and candles not yet lit. Just to the side of the rock she had a bonfire going.

“Come and be on my altar Chris, watch out for the circle I have dug into the dirt. Chris then noticed the ground and was quick to keep from stepping on the edge of the circle. She guided him to sit and then lie on the rock, in the middle of the pumpkins, rocks and candles. Behind his ear she tucked a sprig of rosemary. Chris remembered ‘rosemary for remembrance’. His wrists still caught in front of him. Chris stayed in place; almost feeling to move would be interrupting something very sacred and personal.

His Governess stepped away from him then and began talking in a voice too soft for him to hear. The words had rhythm and Chris thought she was reading poetry to someone. It wasn’t for his ears. At different times she tossed things into the fire. Once he noticed her tossing in what seemed to be a piece of paper with a list on it. She looked at the sky, the ground and off into the four directions while she spoke. It was getting dark and the fire was dying down when she stopped.

“I’m going to release your hands now Chris.” Governess said as she did so. “I want you to lie still for me now while I give the sacrifice for the cycle of life, death and rebirth.” Governess moved his hands to the sides of his body and removed her robe. Her fingers, only a little chilly, wrapped around his cock. She began rhythmically stroking his shaft while she spoke about the cycle of life. Chris began to get hard as she worked on his cock. She knew just how to stroke him to get the most of his reaction.

“Chris, I am going to use you as a sacrifice to the cycles of nature. I don’t want you to speak or interrupt in any other way. Just lie back and everything will be over in a little while.” She whispered near his ear, smoothing one hand over the skin of his belly. Her fingers dipped low, making Chris squirm in pleasure. “Mmmm. that’s my good boy,” She whispered.

She stood over him then, removing her hands from his body. Chris couldn’t keep back the moan of displeasure as her hands left him and the chill air seemed to seep slowly back into his skin. She placed a rock, a shell, a stick burnt from the fire and a feather on his belly. Then she climbed on the rock and carefully straddled him. This time she stroked his cock firmly, the kind of attention she gave him when she wanted him to get hard quickly. It worked just as it always did. Chris was unable to hold back moans of pleasure, his squirming almost made the bowl of water and the rock fall from his belly. Governess managed to hold them in place with her other hand.

Just as Chris thought he would have to start pumping his hips and let everything fall, she stopped. Chris could hear nothing over his heavy breathing. She was silent for a long time, so it seemed to Chris waiting desperately for her attention to return to him. Then she picked up the picture of her Aunt and kissed it. She pressed the picture to Chris’s lips. Lovingly she returned it to its place on the rock, somewhere just over Chris’s head. As she leant over him, Chris tried to catch her nipples in his mouth. She wasn’t allowing that however and she lightly slapped his cheek in reprimand.

With only her fingertips she lightly stroked his cock, keeping him very hard and not letting him loose any interest in the proceedings. She removed the bowl of water and placed on the rock around him. Chris knew there was some order she followed but her attentive fingers wouldn’t let him think enough to remember what that was. She spoke a few soft words; a very poetic sounding speech.

“I want you to come for me this time my Chris. This will be life, as your sperm carries life within it.” She placed her lips around the head of his cock and sucked on him hard. Chris’s hips bucked the warmth of her mouth felt too good to his aching cock. He came in another minute, arching his back and pumping his come into her mouth. She swallowed some of it and let the rest spurt out over her breasts and belly. Scooping some off herself she pushed her finger between his lips and wiped it off on his tongue. Scooting her hips back along his thighs, she kissed his softening cock.

“You are doing very well little one. Soon we will be done and I can take you home, warm you up and put you all snug in your own little bed. This next part you won’t like nearly as much. But when we are done and all cleaned up I have some homemade pumpkin pie for you. I know you were feeling sad not to have had more of the apple pies we made.” She lightly skimmed his belly with her fingernails as she talked. It wasn’t long before Chris felt his cock begin to stir to life again.

“That’s a good boy. I want you to get nice and hard for me again. We have done the cycles of life and death, now is the time for rebirth.” Chris didn’t know what she had in mind. If the next orgasm was as good as the first he didn’t really care.

Governess worked on his cock with her lips, teeth and nails. In only minutes Chris was again as hard as before. His hips strained underneath her, his cock twitched, aching for the release she would give him when she decided he was ready. His breathing became fast and shallow all his attention focused on one area of his body. In the back of his brain, he had enough power to hear his whimpering while he strained under her expert touch.

“That is very good Chris. You may not come this time. I will let you rest there while I pack everything up now. When you have yourself sorted out come and get pie. I have it tucked away in my pack.”

She rolled off his straining, aching body and began gathering up her rocks and shells casually as if he wasn’t lying on that rock barely able to keep from screaming. Chris looked down his chest his cock was purple and streaming juice out still. Taking one deep breath and forcing himself to hold it, he asked, “Why?”

“Your sacrifice Chris. I did tell you I wanted you as my sacrifice.”

When Chris would have reached for his cock and put himself out of his misery she scolded him, “No, no don’t you be a bad boy. I want that cock to stay hard awhile longer.”

Chris groaned in frustration and a little anger. He rolled off the rock and watched her put the last of her things in the packs. “Put on your pack and I will feed you pie as we walk back to the car. Oh! You need your boots on still. Go run down over there and fetch them. I will start walking and meet you down the hill where the trail begins.”

She turned and left. Chris followed, looking for his boots. He wasn’t sure which tree to look under. He grumbled as his feet managed to find every sharp twig on the way.

When he finally found her he was just cold. His erection was as cold as the rest of him. He gave her a look showing her as much of his misery as he could fit into it. She only smiled and handed him his clothes.

“I bet you are glad I brought these with us. I know something else that will brighten you up. There is a little town just a half-hours drive from here. There is a very nice hotel there and we have a room booked for the rest of the night.” She grinned at him. “Are you ready for that pie now?”

Chris thought Halloween might not be a write off after all. “Can I trick or treat?”

She laughed huskily, “I’m so wet right now you can trick or treat all night long little boy.”

Hermitized!

When you really think about it some of the stuff we cook/ bake is really kind of odd. Who ever got the idea to wrap fruit up in sugar and dough and then bake it for an hour? If you had never eaten a pie, would that sound just great and delicious to you?

We will be doing the Canadian Thanksgiving this coming weekend. The pie baking has begun. From Friday until sometime late on Sunday the house will be full of people. Times like these make me wonder if I was really meant to be a hermit. I know I’m not the social butterfly type. But, I never feel more like disappearing through a crack in the floor than when I am surrounded by family. Mostly they mean well. Mostly they don’t feel any need to censor themselves. Mostly they seem to look at me as if I’m the goodie goodie version of the black sheep of the family.

Anyway, enough about that.

Would you like to be a hermit? I think I would not like the grubby part of it. I’d rather have a shower, a hot one. I’d rather have lovely scented soap and shampoo. But it would be nice to be alone. There is something about being alone that makes me feel myself.

Did you Bake a Rhubarb Pie Today?

We are making rhubarb pie today. Not this Cherry Rhubarb recipe, I just added it cause it sounds like a yummy idea. Next time.This time we have just rhubarb but have added nutmeg with three pies, ginger to two of them and one with orange marmalade. Will see how they turn out. Only two are getting baked today, the rest are being frozen to be baked later. Good luck to me trying to fit more stuff into the freezer!

Cherry Rhubarb Pie

Ingredients:

l lb. rhubarb, cut in l/2 inch slices (about 4 cups)
l lb. can (2 cups) pitted tart red cherries, drained
l l/2 cups sugar
l/4 cup quick-cooking tapioca
5 drops red food coloring (or fresh or frozen red cherries)
Butter
recipe pastry for double crust pie

Procedure:

Combine rhubarb, cherries, sugar, tapioca, and food coloring; let stand l5 minutes. Line a 9-inch pie plate with pastry; pour in filling. Dot with butter. (Sometimes I like to sprinkle lightly with cinnamon and nutmeg also)
Top with a lattice crust: From remaining pastry, cut strips of dough l/2-inch wide. Lay lengthwise strips on top of filled pie at l inch intervals. Fold back alternate strips; fold up as you weave crosswise strips over and under. Trim even along outer rim of pie; seal edges. Dampen edge of pie slightly with water and place extra strips around entire rim of pie, covering ends of lattice. Flute edge, pressing well to seal. Bake in hot oven (400 degerees F. 40 to 50 minutes.

Green Tomato Pie

Green Tomato Pie

Pastry for 9 inch pie with cover
3 cups of green tomatoes
2 tbsp. flour
3/4 cup brown sugar
1 tsp. nutmeg
1/2 cup molasses
1/4 cup water

Remove the stem end of the tomatoes, but don’t peel them. Slice the tomatoes in thin rings, cover them with boiling water, and let stand for about 10 minutes, then drain them. Arrange them in the unbaked pie shell. Combine the flour, sugar, spieces, molasses, and water. Pour the mixture over the tomato slices and cover with the top crust. Bake at 425F for 15 minutes and then at 350F for 30 more minutes. Serve with vanilla ice cream, whipped cream, or sweetened sour cream. Serves 8.

This recipe was in the book: In a Country Garden – Life at Ravenhill Farm, by Noel Richardson.