Originally posted to Adult BackWash: Saturday January 31, 2004
“You are a Creative Lover – You aren’t obsessed with excitement but enjoy trying new things. You understand that a healthy sex life needs to include some variety, and are secure enough to allow yourself to delve into the unfamiliar. Even when some practices are beyond your realm, you aren’t scared or disgusted by those things that others consider pleasurable. Continue to explore your boundaries, and take pleasure in the knowledge that you have achieved a healthy balance in the bedroom — something that your lover probably takes pleasure in as well! “
The above came from one of those quiz things – “Are you a Boring Lover?” which I found through LonelyHousewife’s journal on BackWash.
Why do they assume men are good lovers, or eager lovers? If you read the results of the quiz you get the idea that my lover is a randy stud muffin. Well, he doesn’t even exist at the moment. But, aside from that, my past lover was no randy stud muffin. He wasn’t all that keen on sex and didn’t really want to try new things.
So why do we let them talk to us like that? As if all the inhibitions are on our side. It’s not women who are trembling flowers in the bedroom, not in every case. So give us a break!
How can we feel natural about enjoying sex if we keep getting pushed into thinking we should be inhibited and wait for the man to start things. If we waited for him to start things over population would not even be an issue. At least that’s what I’ve found. Your situation may be different. But, I haven’t found that many men who really are randy stud muffins. Many of them will do all the talk, keep the porn collections they seem to think they must have but few are really all that sexual when it comes to the reality.
Does he talk about how much he likes to cuddle, spoon in bed and etc. Yes, that’s nice. But, that’s for after the sex, not the whole show. Sure, some cuddling foreplay might be ok. But, really, before the show starts wouldn’t you rather be doing something a bit more energetic and interesting? Maybe you like a little intermission to make it last longer. I wouldn’t go into cuddle mode then either.
Anyway, that’s my thing about men being sexual animals full of lust. They aren’t. If you really want a guaranteed sex maniac try the zoo… or maybe not. They might arrest you for some of those kinkier things. Anyway, have fun and allow yourself to like sex. So what if he’s a wet blanket. You’ve always got your orgasm under fingertip control.