Lace Bow Elastic Collar

You can buy this collar or… you can make one very much like it.

This collar design could be a DIY project for your boy. Take him to the craft supplies store and let him pick the colours himself. (Of course, you must approve).

You will need:

  • an elastic (not a rubber band) which can fit around his neck snugly but not tight.
  • a fancy button, maybe something metallic or sparkly.
  • ribbon, enough to make a double bow.
  • lace, just enough to gather under the bow.
  • sewing needle and thread.

This shouldn’t be an expensive project for those budget-minding types (like myself.

If you can thread your ribbon through the button hole do so. Likely most won’t work that way. So just wrap your ribbon into a double bow, thread your needle and sew the button into place to hold the ribbon in shape.

Next, gather the lace at one end to form a half circle and sew that into place behind your ribbon and the button.

Lastly, sew the ends of your elastic together and sew the ribbon/lace/button into the ends at the same time. Basically, just pull it all together and try to keep it tidy looking. If you like, add a scrap of fabric to cover your stitches and smooth out the finished product.

Now your boy has a fancy new collar! Wear it well.



Source: $15.99 BM Lace Bow Elastic Collar For Dog Cat Black Wine Red Polyester/Acrylic Dogs Dog Collars – Bopmix

Pushing It

Originally posted to Sex Kitten (2003 – 2004)

The fine print in the instructions had said “Never push the red button.” …But, always, there was the red button and finally, in spite of whatever the consequences were, she just knew she had to push it.

The fine print in the instructions had said “Never push the red button.” It had been there from day one, she noticed it while she was unwrapping her new toy. The instructions had fallen out as she unwrapped it from the bubble wrap. She had left them on the floor until she had her fill of playing and then tidied up all the packaging. She’d kept the instructions, somewhere. She hadn’t actually read them but they were around if she needed them, somewhere.

But, always, there was the red button and finally, in spite of whatever the consequences were, she just knew she had to push it.

What could happen, really? Her love toy was in off mode, lying on his/ it’s back on the rug by her bed. The red button was tiny, located under his left ear lobe. To push it she would need a needle from her sewing box. She had come prepared. At first nothing happened. Well, he/ it was in off mode. Maybe it only activated if the toy was on at the time. She watched awhile longer but got bored and felt sleepy and mildly disappointed in the lack of drama.

She had a great dream. Better than the dream of having sex with a dragon in mid-flight. This time her toy woke up, really woke up not just powered up as he/ it usually did. He stripped off his veneer of animation and became real. She felt his breath on her skin, as if he were really breathing rather than functioning to please her. She could smell his sweat and his passion, as if he were really aroused. She half opened her eyes as his fingers played with her pussy, stroking the lips and folds. She really, fully opened her eyes as his cock slid inside of her. It was such a great cock, the exact thickness of her specifications. The exact shape, length and fullness she had always needed from a man but never found.

The odd thing was, she was sure she was awake now and yet the dream continued. He was on top of her, riding her, caressing her inner thighs, sucking her breasts, nibbling her skin. Of course, it wasn’t possible. He was only a love toy, bought at her local department store for the off season sale price of just $199.

She ran her fingers through his hair, grabbing a hunk and pulling it hard. He only grinned shamelessly and bit down on her nipple. It hurt but felt good too. He opened his thighs, forcing her own legs to open wider and rise up along his warm thighs to wrap around his waist. His cock felt so good, pumping inside of her. His lips, tongue and hands took their fill of her body, teasing her, making her need more and more. Her pussy ached to orgasm. It was a great dream, but it could only be a dream.

When he grunted and orgasmed inside of her she really woke up. This could not be a dream. He wasn’t supposed to orgasm without her permission and he certainly wasn’t supposed to orgasm before she had her own pleasure.

His hard body fell over her, trapping her underneath his firm, warm flesh. His hot breath warmed the side of her neck while his cock softened, still inside her. “You pushed the red button didn’t you?” He laughed.

She said nothing. What do you say to a toy come to life?

“I’m so glad you did.” He levered himself up, reached into her bedside drawer and pulled out her favourite handcuffs. “You might regret it but I never will.”

Pincushions: Make Them, Collect Them and Use Them

teacup pincushionPincushions are functional, decorative and the best way to keep your sewing pins from winding up in various odd places around the house. If you don’t sew you could collect hat pins and use a fabulous pincushion to display them.

The first pincushion I remember using was my Grandmother’s standard tomato-strawberry pincushion. It was red with green embroidery, Made in China. Hers had two strawberries, hanging from the side.

That pincushion design started in the Victorian era. It probably came from the idea of having a tomato on the hearth for good luck in the home. When tomatoes were not available families would use a red ball stuffed with sawdust. At some point it became used to hold pins while the ladies were sewing. (There was a lot of hand sewing in those days).

I don’t know if my Grandmother’s pincushion was stuffed with sawdust. But the old way was to stuff the tomato with wool roving to prevent the pins from getting rusty. The attached strawberry was filled with abrasive to clean and sharpen the pins.

Pincushions are one of the pretty extras you can use when you sew. You can sew without using a pincushion. Just as you don’t really need a thimble, but the pincushion is tradition, adds history and elegance to the event. I don’t wear an apron when I cook, but I still like to look at patterns for sewing them and embellishing them. It’s not about what you need but more about what you want.

The pincushion needs to be the right size to not get in the way of your work, yet it has to hold a good load of pins as you work. It should have stuffing which is tightly packed so your pins don’t wobble around or sink right through up to their heads. I’ve seen very pretty pincushions which would be decorative but not very functional. If you buy a pincushion make sure it’s more than just a pretty face.

See More Pincushion Designs

Is That a Fly…?

Glamor isn’t always about the standard pretty things like hearts and flowers and cupcakes. Glamour can have a bit of spirit, an edge and a dash of… something that makes you itchy and want to wash your hands.

This fly is from Lilien Czech and it’s actually a button, the type you sew on your sweater. Assuming you can sew. If you can’t, then it’s a good time to start learning. Sewing on a button is a way to get started.

Strawberry Jam with Ginger

“My Mother isn’t coming for a social visit, she wants to inspect us, dissect everything I’ve done with the house, the girls and you.” Blair pulled the blankets back over her head.

“Your Mother is coming to see the girls and us. You make her sound like a hyper critical bitch and she’s really pretty sweet.” Bob pulled the blankets off the bed, trying to force Blair to get out of it. “I had Alice and Claire all dressed up but they wanted your strawberry jam on toast and now they’re all sticky. But they loved the jam Mommy made.”

Bob sat on the bed next to Blair while she curled up, tried to pretend it wasn’t too cold to go back to sleep.

“Did you like the jam?” Blair said.

“I did. Now get up. I said we could make the jam this morning, together. You didn’t have to stay up so late just to make jam. I offered to just buy some so you could put it in the mason jars and let her think you made it.”

“She would have known.” Blair laughed. “I wanted one really homemade domestic thing done before she comes out here. I wish I could have made bread too. I just couldn’t keep myself awake long enough for it to rise twice.”

“Come on, get up, your Mother isn’t as evil as you want to think she is.” Bob gave her a playful swat on the butt. “I’ll change the girls, you have to get yourself changed and showered. I can put coffee on once I’ve got the girls all frilled up again.”

“Thanks.” Blair rolled herself out of bed. She avoided looking at herself in the mirror. Just turned on the shower, peeled off her nightie and stood under the hot water, letting it sink into her befogged brain.

Half an hour later as she was pulling her hair into order with a big ‘bad hair day’ barrette she heard her Mother arrive. “All hail the Queen.” She murmured quietly.

It wasn’t that her Mother was a demon in disguise she just had higher standards than Blair could ever meet. Over the years she had given up on ever being good enough or having everything done well enough. Her Mother would come in and take over. Blair hated having to be nice and let her Mother re-wash her dishes, re-order her closets and re-arrange her flowers on the table even.

Then came the advice, always well meant. The girls should have another hair cut. Bob really should be treated more like the man of the house and why can’t Blair just let him sleep in instead of expecting him to be up with his daughters every morning. Not that Blair never helped out. She worked nights and Bob worked days. It wasn’t easy being a couple that way but they wouldn’t have to do it forever. Bob liked his mornings with the girls, especially on weekends when there wasn’t a rush for school and work. Blair was the afternoon shift, home after school, until Bob was there to get them into bed.

Blair pulled a shirt over her bra, put a smile on her face and went out to bell the dragon.

“Blair!” Her Mother’s eyes lit up and she came over for a hug and kiss. No, dragon wasn’t fair. Her Mother really did love everyone, the family. She just needed a few boundaries… just as they say on those afternoon talk shows.

“Hi Mom.” Blair hugged her back.

“Bob and I have just been having coffee with your great jam. I think you put ginger in it? It’s really good. I just wish you had waited… you and I… we always make the strawberry jam together. I nearly stopped and bought two flats of strawberries on the way here today, just hoping we could make the jam this weekend.”

Her Mother, the dragon, the demon in disguise, gave Blair a watery smile. “I like that we can still do some things like the jam making and the crafts for Christmas. I don’t get to do much of that with you any more. Your sisters never did those things, it was always you and I. Kind of silly to get emotional about it. You did just fine without me. You’re good at so many things. Always have been.”

Blair felt her own tear attempting to leak out. “I wanted to make bread to go with the jam too. Just got home from work so late last night… I have everything, fresh yeast, flour… Claire and Alice can help and Bob is really good at taking over the kneading when my arms get tired.”

Blair laughed. “I’m glad you’re here Mom. I always liked making jam, bread and holiday sewing things with you. Now that you’re here a few days we can teach Claire and Alice how to do those things too.”

Blair’s Mom smiled, wiped a tear remnant away and sat at the table. She sipped her coffee, looked at the girls in all the frills and bows on the pink dresses they wore. Bob really had outdone himself on pink and frills. “You know… later we could take the girls for a little hair trim. Maybe a little styling up too. They have such nice curly hair, it’s a shame you don’t do just a bit more styling with it Blair…”

Blair smiled patiently but inside she was rolling her eyes… Mothers!

For the Short Notice Short Story Competition at Hunting the Muse. Let me know if you catch any typos. I think I have them all and then I seem to find one more each time I check it.

Kicking Around the Dust Bunnies

There are several crafty related projects I could pull out and get back to work on, rescuing them from the dust bunnies who have been keeping them company since my divorce about 5 years ago. Kind of sad to admit it has been five years and doesn’t it seem that using the divorce as an excuse for anything should be limited to just one year, not five? Anyway, that’s how it is.

I’m going to take a photo of the Raggedy Ann in progress and see if that doesn’t inspire me to get back to work on her. She has a face, I think. I seem to remember doing the embroidery way back then. I did find my old sewing box and her and her pattern and such inside of it. Once upon a time I even had a really nice and simple pattern for a teddy bear. Not that I have any kids to give them too. My neices have more toys than they care for as it is. My nephew is 12 and probably would like anything I made for him but is likely too old for stuffed animals and far too boy for a dolly, even if Raggedy Ann and Andy are classics.

I guess I could sell them but that seems crass. I don’t know why. I guess it’s to do with appreciating finishing (if I finish it) one of the many projects I have started. I have so many things like this I no longer want to take on anything new or make any kind of promises to anyone. I would like a responsibility free life. But that isn’t practical and would be kind of boring and lonely too. So, plug on.

Crochet, Sewing and Crafty Grrl in General

I want to get back to doing more crafts. I used to crochet granny squares but now I have forgotten how. My new roommate knows how to sew so I can finally get someone to help me learn how to use the sewing machine I got for Christmas just before the divorce. I was using it for a short time and doing ok. Can’t even remember how to thread it now. If it’s a choice of getting old or getting stupid I pick old. 😀

Might make plans for a crafty weekend my next couple of days off. Bring out those masses of buttons, the Raggedy Ann pattern and the half finished doll I was making a few years ago, find the sewing machine which was put away somewhere during the most recent move. I’d like to get making things again. Finally learn to use the sewing machine. I’ve got a great pattern for a dress suit to make, in jersey fabric so it is stretchy and comfortable for a plus size dame like myself. Also has the plus of being very washable too. I’m not a fan of taking anything to the dry cleaners.