Another Social Media Thing

I’ve been using Scoop.it for awhile. This is my second account. I used to have more topics, but when I started my second account (again, not keeping two accounts), there were even more limits on free accounts. Now it isn’t even working that well. At this point I’m probably doing more for their traffic than they do for mine. Not that I’m getting huge traffic and not that they particularly gear the site for sexual or adult topics either. Is it worth keeping?

I do like having a place to post links, beyond this site where I can’t just post the link and leave it. I like posting links for people to find and read more if they have an interest. But, if it’s on my site I have to add some kind of commentary, grab an image (usually) and add the link to the source. One of the things I like about using Scoop.it is the software which does that for me.

Also, I like using the search to see what else is suggested for my topic. I can’t find something like that which I can run myself, self-hosted especially. I would prefer not to use a web service, they can disappear or change without notice or approval.

So, staying with Scoop.it in particular is becoming less ideal for me. I could get a business (premium) account but… that makes so little practical sense considering my budget of zilch.

One other feature of Scoop.it is auto posting to social media. I’ve never been a complete fan of that. But, I don’t mind it so much since it only posts once and I forget to do it myself.

I will watch for an alternative but, I wonder if life would be simpler without it. Do I use it mainly for myself and the idea of generating traffic or do I really like sharing links this way? Would it be just as simple to create a feed of links in my own sidebar here and auto share posts with a plugin? I would miss the suggested content but, the reason I started writing this was the break down in that feature. It used to be much better. Possibly, they (Scoop.it) has limited that more than before as well. Tonight, it was especially not useful, and hasn’t been for several weeks.

So… more choices and more changes.

What’s in a Name for Sex Writers?

Of course I use a pen-name with this blog. I don’t feel the need to change that. Any time I do consider using my name I remember the feeling of having someone recognize in public and expect me to be who they thought I was. This blog is personal but it is not everything I am. I’m a quiet person, not so much private, but quiet. I don’t enjoy talking about sex and focusing on sex exclusively. I am interested in so much beyond what you read here. But, this is what it is and where it is. It’s a limited edition, literally.

Should you use an erotica pen-name? Or should you create a new writing persona for your erotica?

Source: Erotica pen-names; should you lie to your readers?

#SexBloggersAre Hashtag on Twitter

As a sex blogger, how do you describe whatever it is we do? How do you feel about telling others and what do you tell people who aren’t negative but don’t understand what you do and why you do it?

#SexBloggersAreSee Tweets about #SexBloggersAre on Twitter. See what people are saying and join the conversation.

Source: #SexBloggersAre hashtag on Twitter

Sex Bloggers Calendar

Looks like 2009 was the only year the calendar got together. They bought a domain for it but the content up there now is just spam. No calendar of any kind.

Source: New York City Sex Bloggers 2009 Calendar

I think this could be pulled together again. I could find sex bloggers (not restricted to New York) to contribute images so it would mainly be publishing and distribution I’d need to figure out.

Not something which should be free either. I’d need twelve bloggers, including myself, and each of them could have a share of the money. Sex bloggers need to pay the rent too. I’ve thought about it since finding this link but… I don’t think I can take on a project like this. There are too many bits and pieces and things which could go wrong.

Bad Girl Bloggers

The Bad Girl Bloggers seem to have retired. The name is getting passed around as a sex blogger award but the site has no posts since 2011. Maybe that’s just as well. I get tired with the attitude that women who talk about sex are bad girls.

On one hand, it’s kind of fun to think of yourself as wicked, in a sexy way. I don’t like being judged that way however. As if any woman who thinks about sex, likes sex, or has sex is doing something wrong. You can’t be a good girl sex blogger. Nice girls don’t write a sex blog.

So every woman writing a sex blog must be a bad, wicked creature. Except, we’re not. Sex bloggers are just people.

bad girl bloggersSource: Bad Girl Bloggers

WordPress Plugins for FetLife

I canceled my profile on FetLife last year so I can’t give either of these plugins a try. But, I was interested in them and decided to post about them knowing others do still use FetLife.

WP FetLife Importer

This plugin will import your pictures and writings from FetLife into your WordPress site as posts. Nice if you have been writing on the site and want to keep track of it, or keep a back up copy too. I did see some people had a lot of content posted. Crossposting is a great idea for original content posted to a secondary site (not your own domain). You can leave all the posts saved as drafts and not publish them if you don’t want duplicate posts.

WP FetLife

Show your activity on the FetLife site, like having a social feed with events you may attend, groups you joined or posted questions, replies or information in general.

One of the problems I noticed with posting anything linking to FetLife was anyone clicking the link had to be a member of the site (and logged in) in order to see the link on the FetLife site. So, I stopped posting links to groups there. Seemed a wasted effort as people who were logged in didn’t need me to promote groups to them. But, people who might like the information might find it frustrating to have it out of their reach.

Gracie’s Questions

From Gracie on SK: Should you wish to participate, here are my relatively random questions:

Whipped cream in a can, non-dairy topping in a tub, or ala mode? (And, yeah, we’re talking sex play here, not a topping on the kind of pie you’d get at a diner.) Elaborate. *wink*

To be honest I cringe at the idea of sticky stuff on my skin in that way. So I’d be none of the above. But, if he were to pester me about it, he would be the one wearing the ice cream.

So, you’re a sex blogger, or at least a blogger not afraid to be here and respond to such questions… If you’re in a serious or committed relationship, which came first: the blog or your relationship? If you’re not in a serious relationship, one day you might be; when and how do you fancy divulging your blogging vice?

I’m not in a committed relationship. I tend to tell all – I’m pretty horrible at keeping secrets. So, I’d already have him reading my blog by the time things got in a committed way.

Would you rather be a superhero or a villain? Why?

A villain by far. I’m already known for being “the nice one” among family and friends. Do you know how limiting that is? Yes, I am nice, I respect others, I help others… and so on. But, if I could let go of all that I would LOVE to be the villain. Likely that’s what a lot of the attraction of being Dom is. I can feel like I’m dangerous, or at least not so nice.

What’s worse: marketing your blog or marketers contact you for freebie posts at your site?

I don’t mind marketing my site so much. I do things my own way. I read what others say we should do and then I decide to take them seriously or not. People asking for freebies gets annoying because they don’t show any care or respect for what I’m doing. They offer junk, irrelevant junk, mindless and meaningless praise and they even try spinning it all by telling me what a great favour they are doing me – letting me have free content for my site.

What’s the worst/rudest/nosiest question you’ve ever been asked that you refused to blog about? And will you answer it now? *wink*

I have no idea. I usually answer any question. Even something kind of shocking at first will get me thinking and next thing, I’ve written a whole answer inside my head (if not in the blog too). 

Source: In Which Am Tagged & I Grudgingly Respond | Sex~Kitten.net

The Neatness of Blogging About Sex

The real question is – How do Wookies type with all that hair on their fingers? Once you get past that go ahead and read the questions and answers Kilted Wookie posted for this distinguished award in blogging neatness. To follow are the questions I answered when it was my turn and last – the questions and nominees I’ve passed this award along to.

  1. How did you come across your blogging persona?
  2. What inspired you to write your first blog?
  3. What is your greatest unfulfilled fantasy/dream?
  4. What has blogging taught you about yourself?
  5. How many “real life” people know you are a blogger and how did it make you feel when you discovered they knew?
  6. Lights on or off?
  7. What do you normally wear in bed?

Source: A Real Neat Blog? | A Kilted Wookie Writes…

How did you come across your blogging persona?

It’s not really a persona. Somewhere between being contrary, curious and painfully honest I am just being myself. But, we are all full of ourselves, lots of niches and unexpected surprises. So, it’s not too hard to be myself and yet be different from who I am when I’m not thinking about relationships, men or anything related.

The other reason I don’t try to keep up a persona: it’s just too complicated! I know people who blog with several personas over several sites in different niches. I just don’t want to make my brain work that hard to figure out who I am.

What inspired you to write your first blog?

My first blog was on something other than GeoCities (which Yahoo bought out) back in 1996. I loved the free writing, the derring-do of doing anything as long as you could understand enough HTML to do it!

On top of that, it was liberating to write and talk about sex, kinks and fetishes. I didn’t blog about that until a bit later. Back then I was having a great time as an IRC diva. I met a lot of the early online BDSMer’s. I did things online that people don’t seem to do online any more. Or, not nearly as well. In those early days the men were more fun and didn’t always offer you photos of their penis.

I began writing about my IRC adventures just for fun. We played a lot of truth or dare and we played live BDSM scenes and events too. I was involved in BDSM auctions as the seller, buyer and the auctioneer – I was up there being sold too. It was a great group and I wish I hadn’t lost touch with all of them. But.. Dommed if you do; Dommed if you don’t.  Years later I wrote for the red light zone at BackWash.com but the whole network has been gone for years now. That was another good community.

What is your greatest unfulfilled fantasy/dream?

The simple wish for someone to grow old with. I think that is the hardest fantasy to fulfill.

What has blogging taught you about yourself?

I don’t really have an answer for that. Blogging (writing) has gotten me through rough times in my life. Did I learn anything? Seems not, I keep doing the same stuff over again and expecting something to be different. But, I don’t think I’m insane, just contrary.

I guess I have learned that pushing yourself to be perfect and make everyone else content is just a way to burn yourself out. I still haven’t learned it well enough to stop trying to be perfect. With blogging you really do have to write for yourself, no matter what all the SEO guru regurgitate in all their blogs.

How many “real life” people know you are a blogger and how did it make you feel when you discovered they knew?

They all know because I told them. It’s not a deep, dark secret. I even told them I write adult content (fiction and non-fiction). Recently (this year) it came up in conversation and my family were surprised I write about sex. Then they remembered they had forgotten about it. So, not much drama there.

I don’t introduce myself as a sex blogger. I decide when to pop it into the conversation or if to mention it at all.

Weirder than the blogging thing is having posted your photo in your Fetlife profile then have a man you don’t know approach you in the grocery store in town – and he knows your name!

Lights on or off?

You can’t turn the lights off in the day. It doesn’t matter to me. Lights off is nice because I can take off my eye glasses and not see any better or worse in the dark. Lights on is good – less chance of poking him in the eye, etc.

What do you normally wear in bed?

I love long nightgowns. Some are soft cotton, some are silky, slinky satin but the longer the better, with sleeves too. I like something luxurious that will sway along with me when I walk. Assorted colours: deep red, dark pink, jewel tones of green and blue, soft yellow, orange… etc.

I know women who wear underwear and bras to bed, I’ve never done that. It’s enough to wear all that stuff day to day. The evenings are my time to feel decadent, romantic like a woman from long ago, but with the modern conveniences of indoor plumbing.

On to my own nominations and questions forthwith:

Gracie at Sex Kitten @GraciePassette

Submissive Guy Comics @SGCposts

A Bad Gentleman  @abadgentleman

A Slip of a Girl @SlipOfAGirl

Rose at Ruined Boudoir @RuinedBoudoir

  1. What colours do you like to wear to feel sexy, and why?
  2. You have an unlimited budget and no figure flaws to consider – describe a sexy outfit you’d like to wear.
  3. Even if you only walk from the shower to your bedroom… what do you like about walking around nude?
  4. Is sex more mental or physical for you, how/ why?
  5. What is/ was the best thing about your favourite sexual partner so far?
  6. Did you tell him or her at the time, or ever?

 

 

Category Tweaking on Gracie’s Site

You may not suspect this about Dom women but… we like to have fun. Personally, I like to be contrary, cause a bit of mischief and see if I can get away with it.

Ordinarily I’m very honest, open and fairly old fashioned. People mistake me for the nice girl type, but it’s easy to see how that happens. I seldom cause mischief after all. But… its only that much more fun when I do.

Gracie may not even mind about the category description. She may never notice it even, or not for a really long time. Unless she reads about it here…

Don’t be a snitch!

category tweak

via Darla’s Boudoir | Sex~Kitten.net.