Against Homophobia

My nephew is a 16 year old boy/ young man in high school. His generation has very different issues from mine, when I was in high school. I remember the campaigns about not doing drugs. His school has campaigns about accepting homosexuality, promoting it as an option. Quite different from the years of campaigning against teens having sex at all.

I think about the issue of homosexuality, not as pro or con but how it has grown and been shoved at us to the point where almost no one dares to say anything against it. If you aren’t pro homosexulaity you are afraid it, homophobic. This is as silly as saying someone against smoking has a fear of cigarettes. I think the fear does come into play as people are not allowed to speak out against the issue of homosexuality, without facing backlash and being accused of being some kind of bigot, snob, or worse. I haven’t heard of anyone beating up homosexuals in the streets in many years. Now, the reverse seems more likely. Speaking your opinion in any way not supporting homosexuality and the other gender options is likely to get you beat up, at least verbally.

Anyway, I do think about the whole thing, as it pertains to the young people especially. I was once asked how I know I am not gay or bisexual. I gave it some thought. How do I know? When I think about having someone’s hands caressing my body in a loving/ sexual way they are a man’s hands. I don’t feel the same about a woman. Yes, I could be turned on by a woman, just as I could be turned on using a sex toy. But, is using a sex toy the same as a lover? Not in my thinking. A man’s hands, the size and shape of them, the extra bit of hair on the back of the hands and knowing the man they

A kinky fetish dictionary of taboo terms 

AAblutophilia: A fetish for baths or showers that usually centers around a naked person lathering themselves up.ABR: “Adult breast feeding.”Acomoclitic: A fetish for hairless genitals. Similar to: gynelophilous, hirsutophilia, hyphephilia, pubephilia, trichophilia.Acrophilia: A fetish for having sex in high places.Acrotomophilia: A fetish for amputees and shortened limbs.Acucullophilia: A fetish for circumcised men.Acousticophilia: A fetish involving sounds. This can include such things as being aroused by music or a partner’s moaning.Actirasty: A fetish for sun exposure. This is often a fetish of tanorexics, fans of outdoor sex, or those who only date really tan people.Adolescentilism: A fetish for acting, dressing, or being treated like an adolescent.Agalmatophilia: A fetish for a human-like doll, mannequin, or statue. This does not include the use of sex dolls merely as surrogates for real partners. Similar to pygmalionism.Age Play: A type of fetishistic role-playing in which people pretend to be substantially older or younger than they are. Includes adolescentilism and infantilism.Agonophiliac: A fetish for violence or fighting as foreplay.Agoraphilia: A fetish for sex in public places.Agrexophilia: A fetish for having other people know about your sexual activities. This can include people with agoraphilia, those who like to have loud sex, exhibitionists, people who like to put their homemade sex tapes online, or those who simply like to brag about their conquests.Air Inflation: One of the most common types of inflation fetish. This usually involves the fantasy of inflating a person with a bicycle pump to a comically large size. Some practitioner of this fetish enjoy pumping air into their partner’s anus.Algolagnia: A fetish for pain.Allorgasmia: A fetish for fantasizing about someone other than your current partner.Allotriorasty: A fetish for sex partners of another race, ethnicity, or nationality.Alphmegamia: A fetish for older partners.Altocalciphilia: A fetish for high heels. Common among those with a foot fetish. Synonyms: retifism.Alvinolagnia A fetish for stomachs. Likely linked to the importance of wide hips when it comes to natural childbirth. Synonyms: partialism.Amaurophilia: A fetish for not being seen during sex. This usually involves turning off the lights or blindfolding a partner. Some peeping toms and fans of glory holes have this fetish.Anaclitism: An erotic fixation on the objects one was exposed to as an infant, such as anal thermometers, bibs, bottles, pacifiers. Similar to: autonepiophilia, infantilism.Anasteemaphilia: A fetish for partners who are much shorter or taller.Androidism: A fetish for humanoid robots. Similar to agalmatophilia and Pygmalionism.Andromimetophilia: When a woman is sexually aroused by dressing, acting, or being treated like a man.Anophelorastia: A fetish for ravaging a partner.Antholagnia: A fetish for the scent or sight of flowers.Aphephilia: A fetish for human touch.Apotemnophilia: A fetish for having your own limbs amputated.Aquaophilia: A fetish for water that goes far beyond enjoying sex on the beach or in a hot tub.Archnephilia: A fetish for spiders.Asiaphile: A fetish for Asians.Asphyxiophilia: A fetish for being suffocated or choked.Asthenolagnia: A fetish for weakness or being humiliated.Autagonistophilia: A fetish for having others spy on you, particularly while naked or engaging in sexual acts. As opposed to exhibitionists who get off on exposing themselves to unsuspecting victims, a person with this fetish creates situations in which other people may see her naked, like sun bathing nude or changing in front of an open window.Autassassinophilia: A fetish for coming close to death, particularly during sex.Autoandrophilia: A fetish for women who dress, behave, or look like men.Autoerotic Asphyxiation: Choking yourself while masturbating to achieve a more intense orgasm. This often involves the use of belts or ropes. People who have died from this form of masturbation include, kung-fu master David Carradine and INXS rocker Michael Hutchence.Autogynephilia: A fetish in which a man derives sexual pleasure from imagining himself as a woman. This is a common fetish for cross dressers. Origins: coined by Ray Blanchard.Autonepiophilia: A fetish for acting, dressing, and being treated like an infant. Synonym: anaclitism, infantilism.Avisodomy: A form of bestiality involving sex with a bird.Axillism: A fetish for armpits.BBathroom Denial: A type of denial play in which the dom refuses to let the sub urinate and/or defecate.BDSM: “Bondage, discipline, and sado-masochism.” A catchall term for fetish play.Belonephilia: A fetish for sharp objects such as knifes, needles, or razors.BFP: “Bound for pleasure.” A BDSM term.Biastophilia: A sexual disorder in which arousal is derived from the thought or act of assaulting another, often in a sexual manner.Body Inflation: Being sexually aroused by the fantasy of physically expanding yourself, or others. This fetish ofte

Source: A kinky fetish dictionary of taboo terms | Daily Loaf | Creative Loafing Tampa

The Top Wanted Sexual Fantasy

This post started with a pretty simple list of top female sexual fantasies from AskMen. No surprises and kind of plain and atypical really.  I narrowed the list down to be less repetitive.

A lot of fantasies involve knowing you are desired. Men have this theme in many fantasies too. I’ve read this is a reason men pay for sex, to have that feeling of knowing their partner desires them. It’s even become a business to offer the “girlfriend/ boyfriend experience”.

I think the people who are most successful in sexual relationships, the men we call great lovers and ladies men, are the men who understand this and give it to their partners. It’s a great way to get the same back. Making someone feel desired keeps them wanting more of those feelings/ wanting the source.

So why don’t more men and women work with this information? I think there is a selfishness and insecurity which keeps many people from giving or getting the romance and sex they want. Maybe having a lot of sex makes them think they do have what they want and yet… they still have this “fantasy” of being loved, seduced, desired, taken…

Change it up – don’t create the scenario create the relationship so the scenarios can follow and be shared.

  • Dominating
  • Being dominated (force fantasies)
  • Seduction (schoolgirl/ stranger)
  • Threesome
  • Voyeurism
  • Exhibitionism (strip tease)

Source: Top 10: Female Sex Fantasies – AskMen

Defeat the Marketing of Sex

Could it be that women who lose their interest in sex are just as normal as men who also have less interest in sex?

Could it be that most people are sold sex, promoted by the media/ marketing in order to make a lot of money?

Is it all a case of preying on the consumer by making them think they all need to have a lot of sex, and really white teeth?

This leads me to question sex with penetration. I have read that most women do not have an orgasm from sexual penetration. I can add myself to that list. I am old fashioned enough to think sex is about making babies. The sex I see on TV shows, movies and the Internet is not romantic. Even with all the added drama of rushing it and things crashing to the floor… it looks boring to me. “It was just sex”… and yeah, it really was just sex. There wasn’t time or interest to have more to it. Crash, bang, thank you Ma’am.

What is sex like without penetration? Take away concerns about baby making, sexual diseases and… do you have anything left? I hope so! If not, what the heck are you doing?!

If people went back to enjoying sex instead of making it a ‘bodily function’ they would find romance, caring, maybe even… the love in love making. Stop making sex a performance – trying actually being intimate instead. Have sex with someone you want to see again and don’t rush into it.

Defeat the media and the marketers and take sex back. Make it personal, intimate and loving again. Chances are sex will be a lot more desirable that way, for men and women.

Quote below via – For Some Men, Erectile Dysfunction Is Totally Chill

Recent research by Emily Wentzell, an associate professor of anthropology at the University of Iowa, examines the way that erectile dysfunction’s (ED) designation as a medical problem is a consequence of culture and profit-motivated industries. “Ideas about what counts as good and manly sex are cultural, not natural or universal,” Wentzell explains in an interview with Broadly. “There is money to be made off promoting the idea that manly men should have life-long penetrative sex, by selling pharmaceuticals—hence the widespread marketing of ED drugs.”

There are many different justifications given for erectile dysfunction. Today, these range from deeming it a behavioral-based issue to a psychological problem to something purely biomedical. But there are older accounts. Ages ago, Wentzell explains, it was surmised that witchcraft could account for limp dicks. Modern interpretations on the so-called problem, Wentzell says, have been motivated by industries with financial interests.

Are Women Really Sex Objects?

Found on the web:

Are Women Really Sex Objects?

Don’t mean to start a big fight on this fine Sunday morning – but here I go anyway.

When you really think about it, I mean really think about it, aren’t women really sex objects. We try to say they aren’t soooooooo much but, at the end of the day, when all is said and done, women are nevertheless seen as sex objects. We try to hide it as much as we can but don’t we still really believe it anyway?

Of course women are not just sex objects. I feel that we have fooled ourselves into seeing men and women as equals. Women see themselves as objects of sex appeal and guys see every girl as a potential ‘fun night’ – or more – no matter what they say.

Why do women get breast implants? To have better posture? Why do women apply makeup? For sun protection? Why do women spend time and money improving their looks – at the expense of time devoted to enhancing skills and building experience? Because it is fun obsessing over looks?

Maybe you’d say “yeah, you’re right, but the point is that it is wrong and we have to strive to correct the situation.” To that I would reply with this – why spend so much time and energy fighting against our instinct? Against our nature? Look at what amazing things can happen when we go with our instincts – we get to the moon. Look what happens when we fight our instincts – we get a war on drugs that costs money and doesn’t fight drugs.

Why not admit that women are seen primarily in terms of their sex appeal and embrace the truth. It will set you free – and hopefully set them free of their clothes!

What do you think?

First of all, this is assuming all women fit this stereotype. All women wear cosmetics, get bigger boobs, and apparently we don’t get old (or too old) either.

Secondly, there is the idea that cosmetics and etc. are all about changing or creating an appearance on the outside. Yes, of course, that is part of it. But, most women I know like to feel they are looking good. (I don’t think that’s just a woman thing, or a sex thing, or a gender thing).

Do women (or people in general) want to look good in order to be sex objects? Some likely do. I’m sure it’s not 100% however.

This brings up the question… Are men really sex objects? Which makes me think about what makes a person a sex object in the eyes of the beholder? We all have our own view of what is sexy.

Also, last of all, a sex object seems like an inanimate object, something you can pick up, use and discard. I don’t think we should be looking at anyone that way. In the end, it’s the reason I don’t think men or women are sex objects. But, some day there will be sex robots and those will be objects, animated in a mechanical way but still not human. (At least not for at least a generation or three).

Nudity in Ruined City Landscapes

Sasha Kurmaz is a Kiev-born photographer. In his 2013 book, Concrete & Sex, the artist reveals that his personal interest in architecture stems from his graffiti background, where he trekked the city in search of good locations for his art. “While walking, I kept looking over the city. This is the magic of these brutal shapes; functionality, and a frank expression of materiality,” he says. “During these trips I have always done pictures to remember the place and go back at night to paint – sometimes I just shoot the landscapes of the city.”

Via dazeddigital.com

Jailed for Tricky Sex

Judge Roger Dutton described Newland as “scheming,” “deceitful” and “highly manipulative.”

“You were so convincing in your cruel deception of [the victim] she thought she had finally found a man she could love and be with,” he said, reported Mirror Online.

Newland acted for her own “sexual gratification” and ignored the “devastating” impact on the victim, he added.

Source: Woman who tricked friend into sex with fake penis jailed – NY Daily News

Women have been saying the same things (read the judge’s pronouncement above) about men for as long as I can remember. Yet, none of them are arrested and jailed for their actions. Why is this woman? Is it because she used a fake penis instead of having a real one?

I don’t think tricking someone into having sex is ok. I don’t think either gender should, with or without sex toys.

Dare to Try the Sex History Calculator

You, dear reader, are a human being. And as a human being, you are naturally curious, a little bit self-conscious, and maybe even competitive about sex. At

Source: Sex history calculator: Is your number of sexual partners low, average, or high?

Capture

I really was expecting to be on the low side. Actually, I was hoping the poll makers would not laugh or berate me for my lack of sex partners. To end up having more sex partners than 24 percent of women my age was quite a surprise. Kind of a nice surprise. Makes me feel the world isn’t so screwed up after all. At least, the women in my age group. I don’t know about the rest of you.

What Would you Write to Win the Bad Sex in Fiction Award?

Put some thought into what makes a really bad sex scene. Don’t make it too unbelievable, something no one would ever have written, but how bad can you go?

Twisted arms and legs, body parts which move in odd ways or seem to multiply? Words that don’t suit the mood, aggravate the mood or completely bypass the mood and make you want to read something with fluffy bunnies instead?

Write about sex in a bad, messed up way. Play with it.
Idea source: Bad Sex in Fiction Award 2015: What are they and does Morrissey have a shot? | News | Culture | The Independent

His knuckle rubbed her pussy button, giving her a hard on. Once she was really wet, dripping like a leaky faucet, he dived into her crotch shoving deep, mining her with his throbbing, purple pussy eater.

It doesn’t need to be long. In cases like this, short is a good thing. It is fun to write, without the pressure of trying to make it good.