The Endless Knot

Originally written for The Crying Clown Zine (c. 1998)

In whatever stray corner of the world you find yourself in you may have just found a Pagan or Wiccan if they are wearing a five pointed star with a solitary point up inside a circle. Being a solitary (Wiccan) myself I am partial to this view of the pentacle, I’m sure it has absolutely nothing to do with those nasty rumours of Satanism. Some Wiccans hang pentacles from their necks, some stab them through coats and sweaters and shirts and others go for something more permanent and painful and get it tattoed.

Pentacles should be worn on the front just before the heart, according the mystical tradition. Go all out and make your own but it should be prepared when the moon is rising in Virgo and only on a Saturday or Tuesday night in an atmosphere scented with alum, cedar wood, aloes and resinous gum.

Whatever your choice a pentacle is still a pentagram inside a circle. If it is genuine and not some factory-bred knockoff it should be one continuous line. No seams, stops and starts just one unending line. Though endless knot sounds like a great way to refer to your hair on those dreaded “hand me a hat” days it is also another name for the pentagram. Goblin’s Cross, witch’s foot, Blazing Star of White Magic are other fancy labels that could fool your friends and pester your enemies. Because I am really just a simple Dragon let’s stick with pentacle, I’m getting used to typing it now anyway.

There are endless theories and ideas of what the five points represent. Of course this is a biased article and all the following are appealing to me, there are dozens more out there in libraries and web pages. First, the elemental theory seems to be the most popular with Wiccans. Four points represent the elements: earth, air, fire and water and the fifth is the spirit. These are the basic necessities of life beyond food, clothing, shelter and taxes. The most romantic sounding idea is: a man standing upright with arms out stretched and the world behind him, a man in tune with the world around him. Some feel the pentacle represents the stages of humainty or life: babyhood, adolsence, adulthood, middle age and old age. Or birth, initiation, love, repose and death. Just about any other five things can be tossed in for consideration such as the five senses, the five fingers on the human hand…

The pentacle or pentagram is older than written characters. The five pointed star can be traced back to the Pharohs when it symbolized the rising up of the spirit to the heavens and the power of the Earth. Commonly associated with creation and spirituality, it is used as a symbol of protection and healing, considered to carry power for good and protecting not only the physical well being but the mental and spiritual too.

So much talk of the star but the circle is what makes a pentagram into a pentacle. The circle of the pentacle represents protection and is used often in magic. Inside the magic circle there is safety. The pentacle is an emblem of a happy homecoming and was and still is worn as an amulet.

The pentagram is a unicursal figure. Always drawn in one continuous unbroken line. Each of the five things represented are connected to one another, unless the line is broken. No one thing is any stronger or better or more important than the other, they are all dependent on each other. This is what the pentacle really symbolizes whatever variables are assigned to the five points. In magic the number five stands for the power of nature.

Pentacles ward off evil and you never know when you may need to do a little warding! It seems Eliphas Levi (1810 – 1875) was responisble for starting the whole upside down thing. Eliphas, drew the pentacle with two points up and added the goat’s head design denoting evil the devil and all the rest. Some Pagans believe this is the Horned God, the male God who is the counterpart of the Goddess. However all of that is kind of muddled by the Christian belief in the devil with his interesting set of horns and goatee. Wiccans do not believe in hell or the devil, though some would say we worship it. Just goes to show more people need to get to the library or at least watch less TV.

I have found a ritual called the Sign of the Pentacle, though how old this is I could not discover. Still, any ritual should not be taken at face value. Each should be screened by the user and judged according to their individual beliefs and feelings. Here is the ritual: Starting at the left breast move to the top of your head or third eye, down to right breast then up to left shoulder and acoross to right shoulder and back down to left breast again. This could have been designed as a Pagan/ Wiccan version of the Catholic signing of the cross. It is meant to be used to ward off danger, evil or whatever you feel you need to ward off.

Happy New Years to all my fellow Wiccans and everyone else who stopped to read here.

Sometimes you Keep your Spirits up with a Sharp Pointy Stick

I’m hoping tomorrow will bring the start of better things. Though I shouldn’t become pessimistic and not enjoy the good things just because I feel down about the un-good things.

Most of this week I will be at my sister’s house in Newmarket. Mainly because she and her daughters are away visiting our Mother in Florida for the week and I didn’t like to leave my nephew, Zack, alone so much time. His Dad is here and I know would do his best. But, they now have two businesses to run and there isn’t any way he could handle all that by himself for a week and keep Zack company. So here I am. I’m also down to a few last dollars and they are turning the power off on the house for the neverending story of renovations. I hope all the fish and such which I have in the freezer will be ok. I bought it when the oven/ stove was still functional. Who would expect they could break that? It was brand new. Anyway, I’m tired of problems and not having an oven or laundry washing or money.

I’m reading a new book from the second hand store. It’s by Gena Showalter. About people running a business to catch cheating husbands and wives. Basically they have staff who dress up like easy pickings and send them out to tempt the cheating spouses. I think it’s a bit silly. Most men (and some women) are likely to take up that kind of offer if they actually get a chance. In reality they aren’t likely to get a young woman who looks like a porn star unless they have something she wants. But, the women who catch the cheaters are only checking up on them cause the wives or girlfriends have cause to be suspicious. So, most likely, they are screw ups, literally.

I don’t understand why married people cheat. I guess too many get married for stupid reasons and then can’t be bothered to care about or respect the person they are married to. I only seriously considered sex with someone else while I was married for the short time when I wanted to have kids and the husband decided he didn’t. In that case it wasn’ t about the sex or finding someone new and exciting or any of that BS. I just really wanted at least one kid of my own. Now, here I am, 44 and single and it’s not likely to happen. I’m divorced so I could screw around until I turn up pregnant. But, that’s not me. First, I just don’t want such casual sex. I’d like him to at least know who I am and have some real care and respect for me as a woman versus a plastic blow up doll. Second, being a single parent just isn’t all that appealing. I have seen how important it is for kids to have two parents.

Anyway, that’s the chatter for tonight. I am so crazy tired. If I’m not doing something and just sit down I start to fall asleep right away. Maybe it is the stress. If I stop to think I do feel pretty upset. The key is to just not stop and think. Much more fun to daydream instead. It’s funny how many times I have caught a Keanu Reeves movie on lately too. Funny in a weird way almost. Don’t think I’m being foolish about not thinking about the reality. It’s just that thinking about it just to stress yourself out isn’t going to be of much help. I think about it when I have something real I can do and plan.

Maybe the cheque will hit my bank tonight or tomorrow and I can start paying the bills. One of them has begun to phone this week. If I can pay off a good chunk of it I won’t have to call them back. That would be nice.

It’s Time… for Keanu


There are times when he looks pretty scruffy, pretty ordinary or not even that good. There are times when he looks like your brother, nice but a goof cause you know him too well and all the mystery is gone. There are times when he looks like a movie star and a leading man. But, there is something about Keanu and no matter what other manbots come along he is still the main manbot and I still just like something about him, more than just the way he looks.

On Flickr: Keanu Reeves and Loving Keanu Reeves.

The Meaning Behind Your Name

Lady Banana posted this plan… you look up your name in the Urban Dictionary for the true meaning. Or something like that.

I like this one:

a young woman, typically associated with romantic themes. Though the name originally came from the Roman tradition of placing a wreath of laurels on victors’ heads, it has developed more emotional ties in recent years.

The most famous Laura is from Dr. Zhivago in which she is a star-crossed lover who leaves her true love to marry another man.

Let the Man Do the Work

I have encountered a new guy. Can’t say we have met as we have not met yet. We will be having breakfast/ brunch on Thursday. He is widowed with a 19 year old daughter. He does insurance for refurbished boats. Sounds like someone I could like.

What I have not told my Mother is just how we encountered each other and what other thing I know about him that I probably won’t tell her. I will whisper it to you… shh, keep it to yourself. We met on an adult personals site and he likes to be a sissy, frills and all. You may be thinking this is something I can not do, could not be interested in… and yet… I am. Not sure about it 100%. But, I always did say I would marry a guy who could have a maid to do the housework. So, isn’t this my way of keeping my promise to myself, in my own weird way.

People don’t talk about fetishes and what they like along with sex. I’m not a porn star, nympho type. But, I do know that I am not entirely straight forward. Yet, I don’t feel entirely comfortable to write about it. I know my Mom and sisters think cock sucking is dirty, not something they would do. I’m a bit on the fence there. My ex wasn’t very clean and that does stick in your mind. But, I do like being in control. I do like being the one sitting with a wicked grin while he sweats and moans.

On the other hand… a man who will perform pedicures, bake cookies and clean the washroom as sexual foreplay isn’t all bad. Of course, not all of those at the same time or order.

I used to write adult content for the adult part of backwash.com. I used to write adult stories for a man I liked online. It wasn’t icky. How could it be as long as I was in charge. I could almost be a born again virgin if I didn’t want to get rid of the title quite so much. Yes, I like sex. When it’s done well. To my specifications. Having a little man to boss around could be a good thing.

But, like I wrote, we have yet to actually meet. There’s a long way to go from bacon and eggs to letting him fluff my pillows or wash my windows. Still, as nice and pleasant and polite as I am… there is a part of me that just likes being evil, wicked and shocking. How suitable to have someone who wants that rather than someone who will think I’m peculiar and undesirable.

Advice to Blog Writers and Readers

I’ve been trying to read the blogs as I drop cards through Entrecard. That’s why I am commenting more and then coming back here with it when I think I wrote something I’d actually like to remember myself. This comment I posted to Temerity Jane, in a post about lying to your blog readers and trying to make yourself out to be a blog star. Makes me think of someone (more than one) who began calling himself an “Internet Personality”. What does that really mean? It’s just BS, designed to blow up their own ego. At the end of her post Temerity Jane asked her readers to post their best advice for bloggers and readers. Mine follows:

I think we need to remember that we are people, both the readers and the bloggers. When you write be true to who you are. Don’t go too far with the idea of writing to an audience. If you aren’t writing to yourself it’s going to be meaningless.

Readers are looking for all kinds of things when they come to a blog. There is no way you can be what everyone wants so don’t try. Organize your content so it is easy for readers to read and find. Try to declutter your sidebar and keep the blog looking clean. Keep the content as the focus not the gadgets. (I’m not the best example there cause I enjoy the gadgets and avatars for myself).

The Afterglow

I’m sipping non-diet Coke (the beverage, not the powder) and having some quiet time to myself. It’s pretty busy here at the Newmarket house. Three kids and a lot of events, some of them even planned. It’s just after 10: pm now and I’m looking for more crochet patterns for the simple minded. I just can’t seem to get mine looking anything like the ones in the pictures. I have restarted several patterns a few times and now I’m back looking for more.

Granny Square Slippers

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. Thanks to Happy for making me a star for the day.

Seasons Greetings and Good Night.