I’ve Become Super Noob

I started writing as Super Noob on Lindsay’s blog, Web Design for Idiots. Tonight I wrote the following as an introduction to who I am and why I’m someone who might have a reason to be writing there.

I’m posting this from my very messy desk with the TV on to my left and my nearly cold coffee at my right hand, in danger of wrecking my faithful little scanner. I’m a real woman. I’m a real, live, 40+, divorced Canadian woman, a writing legend in my own mind.

In June of 1996 I began on the Internet. I was an IRC diva for quite a long time. It was a lot of fun and most of it I really should not write about here. That’s what personal blogs are all about. I wrote for a zine first, a small print publication called The Crying Clown. From there it was all online. At one point I was producing my own newsletter for writers, InkSplatters, sent out through what is now Yahoo Groups. I was a web writer for HerPlanet, BackWash, BellaOnline, Suite 101, WZ-ard.com and other sites, forums and newsletters some still living and some not. I still write for Creative Fat Grrl on LockerGnome, a babbly blog more than anything seriously functional. Writing for a network is a different educational experience than writing for yourself. Which is one reason I keep doing it.

I’ve had sites and then blogs of my own. I didn’t begin online in the great time of blogging, I was here before that. So my first sites were put together with just HTML code as I learned and goofed it up. I’ve used software and I’ve cut and pasted code and I’ve hand coded my own pages. I’m not an expert, time alone isn’t enough to make you an expert at web design or development. I have learned however and as I learn I see how much more there is to be explored and discovered. But, don’t look to me expecting I’m a know-it-all. If I ever say that you can be sure I’m just laughing at myself.

I love creative things. I’ve done so many interesting forms of art, just to try them out. I made ASCII art for a few years. I continue to take digital photos of abandoned places here in Ontario, starting in 2006 when I bought my first digi camera. I’m also teaching myself to draw cartoons, some people even like them! This week I re-learned the art of cutting out paper doll chains so I could make them into a graphic for a blog. I really think it’s important to keep the creativity and free writing in blogging. It would be a real shame if the personal journal and creative element of blogging were lost in the rush for SEO and money making.

Anyway, I’m here to help the less experienced blogger with my experiences. I’ve got a stack of great books about web design on my bookshelf and I will be using them (finally) for more than a place to hide my dust bunnies. I seem to collect books with great good intentions and then not get very far. You can also find me writing about web writing and posting writing ideas and prompts on my blog, Word Grrls.

ThatGrrl.ca

Completely off topic… did you know that a nail file works really well if you have an itchy spot on your back that you just can’t reach? I’ve been rubbing my back on my chair tonight wishing for something to work. Then I had the great idea for the nail file (not one of those treacherous metal ones, just some cardboard type) and that worked great!

What’s in a Name for Sex Writers?

Of course I use a pen-name with this blog. I don’t feel the need to change that. Any time I do consider using my name I remember the feeling of having someone recognize in public and expect me to be who they thought I was. This blog is personal but it is not everything I am. I’m a quiet person, not so much private, but quiet. I don’t enjoy talking about sex and focusing on sex exclusively. I am interested in so much beyond what you read here. But, this is what it is and where it is. It’s a limited edition, literally.

Should you use an erotica pen-name? Or should you create a new writing persona for your erotica?

Source: Erotica pen-names; should you lie to your readers?

Adult, Sex and BDSM Artists on Patreon

Patreon is a network for artists: musicians, podcasters, video makers, bloggers, game makers, writers, photographers, cartoonists, pretty much anything you can put into a digital file and share online.

The idea is for artists to display what they create and get sponsors/ patrons to enable them to keep working on their creations. Anyone can get an account on Patreon and choose to give financial support to the artists with a monthly amount based on how much they want to spend and how often the artist creates new art. Read more about it all on Patreon. I’m not explaining it as well as the founder and staff do.

I thought I would find more adult artists on Patreon. So far, just these:

Retro Internet: The 1500 Point Purity Test

Long ago, in the days of the Internet surfing highway, there was a purity test with over 1000 questions. I found a copy of it. Posted for your viewing (or take the test) pleasure.

THE UNISEX PURITY TEST

If you thought the millenial purity test was bad, well you ain’t see
nuttin’ yet!

This is the 1500 point Purity Test!

We felt that the 1000 point version lost a lot of the “fun” of the
earlier versions, so we re-wrote it, adding a few new sections, and
a shitload of questions. This test is guaranteed to be nosier that
your parents, more invasive than the census, and containing something
to offend everybody.

Also included is an answer form so that you can remember where in the
test you were, or show to a friend.

Continue reading Retro Internet: The 1500 Point Purity Test

Inspire Yourself

Originally posted to Sex Kitten (2003 – 2004)

We were given the topic “Inspirational Women” but all I could think of were the women in my life, those I admire and those I love. We all inspire someone, somewhere. Why don’t we give ourselves more credit?

Why do we get inspired by other women? Is it really due to their achievements or is there more to it? Do we see ourselves in their struggle and do we envy their success as we compare ourselves to them? I do, but then I think there is really no reason I can’t be making more successes in my own life, doing the things that matter to me. What holds some of us back? Why do we choose to go shopping, see something on TV or just never start all these great ideas and plans we have? Is it learned helplessness or do we just have so little faith in ourselves? Really, there isn’t any reason we can’t all be inspirational women. Maybe we already are, to someone.

Those inspirational women you read or think about mostly wouldn’t think of themselves that way. If you could go back in time as ask Amelia Earhart, Nellie McClung, Helen Keller, Boadicca, and Nellie Bly what made them inspirational I bet they would wonder too. Women tend to question our own achievements and see them as less than they really are. We compare ourselves to other women and see how much more we could be doing and then everything we have done seems smaller and less important. We cheat ourselves. Men don’t do that. They think every least thing they do is great and should be made note of. We call them cocky. Why aren’t we more like that? You don’t need a cock to believe in yourself and your abilities. Trust yourself, when no one is there for you, you are.

I admire women who are part of my everyday life yet I don’t think any of them would feel they belong on a list of inspirational women to be admired. I find my Grandmother and her sisters inspiring: Violet Scherle, Alice McRoberts, and the others, all deceased now. I find women I have contacted and worked with on the web inspiring: Deanna, Jade Walker, Bev Walton-Porter, Debbie Ohi for instance. Think of the early women doctors, the old midwives and herbalists who fought battles to do with family, career and a woman’s place in our world. I admire my Mother for being a Mom with four kids and a less than pleasant husband. As I grow older I understand her life and things she must have felt.

I admire women writers like: Shirley Jackson, LM Montgomery, Anne Morrow Lindbergh, Victoria Holt and Anne Stuart for their imagination and craft with words. I admire women pioneers like Susanna Moody and her sister Catherine Parr Traille. I admire women like Helen Keller and Kat at Sex Kitten who are fighting with health problems and winning. I admire my own sister, Sarah, for starting up her own business and keeping it going even though it’s very scary to have big debts, small children and an insecure income. I find Angela Comelli, a friend from high school inspiring cause she was beautiful (she literally turned heads as she walked down the street), very intelligent, witty and a lovely, kind person and she thought I was all those things too.

I think the women I find most inspiring are those who achieve their dreams while being single, working parents. Women who struggle to keep going after huge setbacks like a divorce, a death or whatever else comes along in life. I think we should all take some time to admire each other, for we have all faced trouble we thought we couldn’t survive and yet here we are, still working on keeping things together and creating our dreams too.

Canadian Content Contributor on Squidoo

I put my name in to be the Canadian Contributor on Squidoo.

This is what I wrote:

I am a proud Canadian and I do like to write about, research, and teach the world about Canada and Canadians. I already publish a content feed on Scoop.it about Canadiana. Mainly bits of things I find online or happen to think of myself. Scoop.it gives me a place to stash links, share ideas and knowledge. I have over 3,000 views and 41 subscribers, not a lot but it does give me a nice start for promoting any Canadian posts I make as the Squidoo Contributor. Anyway, that’s just numbers. The fact is I was born in Toronto and have grown up all over Ontario. As a younger woman I travelled alone across Canada on the Greyhound bus, staying in youth hostels, meeting other young travelers/ backpackers. I do love it here and travelling (on a shoestring) was a great way to see more than the cleaned up tourist places. These days I photograph abandoned, derelict farm houses. Travelling around Ontario (day trips and some over nights) I see a lot of backroads, get coffee in local restaurants and I keep in touch with other explorers across Canada through the groups I founded and moderate on Flickr. I especially like Canadian music, literature and movies/ TV shows. Here we get so much media from the US it can be overwhelming. I make a point to support our own Canadian media by watching and listening to CBC, the oldest Canadian broadcaster and the most Canadian focused of them all. If you want to know about Canadian music, writers and others you can count on the CBC to have current news and old facts in their archives too. I studied Canadian Literature as a course in high school and college. I do read a lot of everything, not just Canadian, but I am aware of Canadian writers and did belong to an online group (until it folded). I had thought to start up another group but that does take a huge amount of time and energy so it on a project on the backburner. Meanwhile I continue to write my site for writers and it does have some focus on Canadian resources (just because that is what I find most useful for myself, as a Canadian freelance writer). I have probably written too much but I would very much enjoy covering the topic of Canada for Squidoo. Partly because as a Contributor I hope to be given some extra promotion on the site and then be read and heard. (So important to feel someone is actually reading and listening). Also, I would be happy to bring some niches of Canadian culture, history and art to light.

I’m sure I had paragraphs but they didn’t work with the form used. So it is a solid block of text, mainly here for my own amusement.

Tempting Tuesday #7

Many writers look for drama to write about when they work with an adult story. What about something ordinary? People who live BDSM lifestyles all the time have to brush their teeth, take the kids to school, feed the dog, make coffee in the morning, do the laundry… all those ordinary things. Take something ordinary and turn it around, make it seem like an adult thing, as if brushing your teeth (for instance) were a fetish, not just good dental habits.

The interesting thing about changing your point of view on something ordinary is how you change the way you write. In order to make it seem less ordinary we add in detail and description. Things we usually do by remote, routine, become important and blown up to be seen as sensual, instead of dull.

Where the Wild Things Are: Pagans and Writing

Originally posted to ‘BackWash: Where the Wild Things Are’ newsletter, November, 7, 2003.

What have you written or published lately? Not that every Witch or Pagan needs to be a writer or share their writing with others. But, we do tend to be journal keepers of some sort. Most like writing in their Book of Shadows; thoughts, ideas and experiences. Some choose to go farther and share those same ideas and experiences with others. Of course, each of us chooses where and how large our audience is. Also, how personally connected they are to yourself.

Anyway, I’ve found a lot of Pagans in the arts: writing, crafting and so on. We’re a pretty artsy bunch.

If you do want to dip your toes in the water and share your Pagan writings you can find plenty of online groups. Some are geared to specific areas of Paganism and some are geared to those who are Pagan and writers. It’s not trading one craft for another, it’s growing yourself and your craft.

Of course, you are taking a chance. You can count on finding someone to disagree with whatever you write about. Sometimes they disagree in the form of an attack against you personally. You can choose to ignore this immature stuff, though it’s not easy to stop yourself from feeling defensive. This is all very personal stuff after all. But, if you’re lucky enough to stumble into a group of like-minded people you will have so many new ideas, new angles and slants on old ideas and access to so many experiences. It’s like finding a vast treasure vault without having the expense of hiring a boat, getting seasick and risking pirate attacks, well something like that. You get the idea.

Anyway, this newsletter is one of the things I have written to share with other Pagans. Before this I write a few articles for a print zine and assorted other odd bits here and there. Some newsgroup postings too but that was quite a long time ago before the newsgroups got so snit picky.

I wouldn’t count myself as some grand high authority on everything Pagan. But, I do think I have some ideas and a sense of what I believe to be right and good that I can share. You, the reader, can decide how you feel about what I write. I’m always glad to hear from you, even if you don’t think everything I write is glorious and completely right. We all see things differently and what feels right to me could seem completely crack-brained to you. I don’t mind. I’ll listen to you and make up my own mind. Just as I expect you do with the blatherings I type in here.

If you do post/ publish your Pagan writings online let me know. I’ll be glad to give you a link in the newsletter. Although I believe in reading things I don’t agree with, in order to get more perspective, I won’t link to or promote something I believe is completely harmful.

Seasons Greetings (cause it’s always some season).

Erotica Writers are Nice Girls Too

This was originally posted to HubPages. However, they unpublished it (and several other posts) because it was too adult. I have relocated the post here and you can bet I’m not really happy with HubPages today.

I Write Adult Non-Fiction and Erotica

I’ve written erotica and non-fiction adult content too. It’s not as dramatic as people want to think. The worst reaction I had was from my Mother and a sister when they found out. But, once I showed them what I was writing they mellowed out about it.

I’ve written erotica and sold it too. I also write non-fiction for adult sites. It’s an interesting market. I get ideas and experience which work well for me when I’m writing in other markets, venues and genres too.

There is a big difference in writing erotica versus plain, pure pornography. One of the differences is that porn sells a lot easier then gets passed around online without any credit to the original author. Erotica writing is better in the long run, even for making money, because anyone who wants to hire you based on what you have written, can actually find you.

Adult Content Warning for your Blog

You can easily add an adult content warning to your WordPress blog. It’s even a free plugin.

How to Know What’s Erotic and What’s Not

You can read about the distinction between erotica and pornography on any site which accepts erotica from writers. Most have drawn a line where they feel one becomes the other.

Basically, erotica has a story, there may be romance but either way it’s sensual and takes time to tell a story. There is more to the writing than intercourse. Erotica isn’t hard core. Erotica isn’t about making love necessarily, but it’s more than just a quickie. When you write erotica there’s foreplay and a story to go along with the quickie.

Adult Writing Prompts

I like Writing for Adult Blogs

I began writing on the adult side ten years ago when I wrote for Adult BackWash. That site is now gone. But, for me, it all started when BackWash needed more writers for the adult side of the site. It was the side of the site where the writers got to write anything, within reason (but there were very few limits imposed). Plus, it was red. I love the colour red. So I wrote a regular adult column which I called Bait and Switch. It was fun. Most of the time.

There were times when I really didn’t feel like reviewing adult sites to add to the links. Or there were times I didn’t have anything new to say. But, that happens no matter what genre you write.

The difference with adult content is that you have the frigid versus hooker issue. People expect women writing adult content are pretty free and wild and having sex at least once every day/ night. (Men feel this way more than women readers, but most of your readers are men). If you aren’t busy with boyfriends, toys, and more, you can feel you have nothing to write about. But, you’re wrong. You can be a nice, good girl type and still write about romance, dating, intimacy and issues with all three of them.

Any woman can write erotica. It’s about your attitude more than your experience, or lack of it.

Tempting Tuesday #1

I decided to write a weekly writing prompt for adult writers, erotica writers and sex bloggers. It happens to be Tuesday today so let’s call it Tempting Tuesday.

The first writing prompt will be…

There’s a fly in the room. Not just on the wall, like a spectator, but actually buzzing around and making a pest of itself. Write an erotic scene, including an annoying fly.